Wrong But Right
by evans516
Summary: Kelly's known her for as long as he can remember. Before she was just Andy's little sister, but there's something different now. They've been keeping their relationship a secret from everyone, including one person they both care about. But, what happens when he's gone and the guilt of their secret sets in?
1. Mystery Girl

**thanks for checking out my new story! this is my first for chicago fire, hope you like it! :)**

_Mystery Girl_

Kelly got up that morning, quietly slipping out of bed to let her continue to sleep. As he dragged his feet over to his dresser to grab a change of clothes, he was completely envious that she got to sleep in; it was summer and she was starting as an art teacher at the elementary school in the fall. He watched her for a moment, her dark hair splayed out on the pillow, her gentle breathing. Spotting her pale yellow sundress on the floor, he picked it up and laid it out on the bed before starting to get ready himself. Returning from the bathroom, he noticed she was starting to sit up and stretch awake.

"Mornin' Lace," Kelly greeted her as she pulled her sundress over her head. "Did I wake you?"

"Nah," Lacey shook her head, sitting back on the edge of his bed to put on her wedges. Once she had her shoes on, she looked over at him, studying his expression. She had seen this look on his face before over the last two months since they had gotten together at the beginning of the summer.

"What's that look for?" she asked, though she knew.

"What look?" Kelly asked innocently and she gave him a face that said _oh please_; he shrugged. "What are we doing Lace?"

"You're going to go start your shift," Lacey answered like it was obvious. "And, I'm going to teach that pottery class at the rec center."

"You know what I mean," he said back. He knew that he had to be breaking some kind of guy code by doing this but it was hard not to. "How long are we going to keep this from him?"

"It's not as big of a deal as you think," she reasoned.

"Hey Kelly!" they heard Shay calling from out in the hall. Lacey dove under the blankets on Kelly's bed, curling up under them to hide. Shay knocked on the door once before letting herself in. "You ready to go? We're running late."

"Ah, yeah," Kelly nodded, seeming a bit nervous. "Just a sec, I'll meet you downstairs." Shay looked him over skeptically.

"Were you talking to someone?" she asked curiously.

"No," he shook his head. She spotted the purse sitting on the floor by the doorway. Looking up at him after the purse, Shay raised her eye brows.

"The mystery girl?" Shay asked, amusement in her voice; he didn't answer right away. Being roommates, she knew that someone had been sneaking in and out of the apartment. It was driving her crazy, not knowing who this girl was for this long. Whoever she was, it must be good for him to be keeping it a secret from her since they told each other everything.

"Ugh, forget it. I'll figure it out eventually," she grinned at him. "See ya downstairs."

"Yeah," Kelly nodded, shutting the door behind her. Once he closed the door, he could hear Lacey rustling under the blankets behind him as she got back out of the bed. "Not that big of a deal?"

"Just not the way for people to find out," Lacey brushed it off, though she knew how surprising this was going to be to everyone.

It had started out as just a fling, that was why they kept it a secret. Why bother telling people if it wasn't going to pan out? But now, after two months of seeing only each other, they knew it was starting to get serious. And the longer it went on, the harder it was to keep from the people they cared about.

"What if the three of us talked tomorrow after your shift?" Lacey finally offered.

"Just the three of us?" Kelly asked, a slight smile spreading across his face. "I'd rather there be more witnesses in case he tries to kill me."

"He won't kill you," Lacey smiled back, taking his hand. "He loves you."

"He loves you more," Kelly reasoned. "That's what I'm afraid of."

"Don't throw that bro code crap at me," Lacey laughed, kissing him once. "I'll see you both tomorrow, all right? Have a safe shift." He nodded, kissing her again. "Bye Severide."

"Later Darden," Kelly said before leaving her alone in his room.

Lacey waited patiently to be sure Kelly and Leslie were gone before leaving the apartment herself. She had wanted to leave the night before when she knew that Leslie would be asleep, but Kelly gave her his usual_ I don't like you leaving late at night_ spiel. And truthfully, she did prefer to sleep over, to stay in his arms. Stepping outside into the warm morning light, she hailed a cab to take back to her apartment.

She had moved into the small loft at the beginning of the summer, moving back to Chicago after spending six years away. Four of those years she spent at school in Virginia, then the other two she had taken a job right away where she had done her student teaching in that area. Now, she was ready to come back to the city and people that she loved. And it was that love for her older brother Andy that made them keep the secret. How would he react to his little sister seeing his life long best friend?

To be honest, the entire thing had happened by accident. Lacey had never seen Kelly as much of anything, just her older brother's cute friend. Being five years older than her, he had never really seen her that way either. She was Andy Darden's younger sister, the girl they tossed in their family's pool more times than he could count, the youngest bridesmaid at Andy's wedding. They killed spiders for her, packed her boxes in the truck before she went to school. Sometime between then and now though, things changed.

_Really_, Lacey tried to reason to herself._ It was Andy's fault_. That afternoon back in June he was the one that was supposed to help her move her new couch into her apartment. He had to leave her though, having a prior obligation to his wife and two sons that day. Not wanting to leave her helpless, however, Andy called Kelly and had him go over to help her move. How was anyone supposed to know what would end up happening on that couch?

Lacey opened the door to her small but perfect apartment. Immediately to the left was her tiny kitchen, and straight ahead was the long, rectangular studio space. Her bed was over to the far right, tucked against the corner and covered in pillows. With it's back to the bed sat her couch, which faced the tv. Her closet sized bathroom shared the wall with her bed and there was an even smaller closet next to it. What made this apartment so perfect for her was the large window in the kitchen; she could open it up and get outside to her small square cement balcony that had an amazing view.

Showering first, Lacey then changed into a pair of cut off shorts and an old button down t-shirt that was splattered with paint. In addition to her teaching job that she was going to start next month at the elementary school she was teaching art classes a few days a week at the rec center; today was a pottery class. After piling her hair in a messy bun, she grabbed her bag and headed off to teach her class. Walking down the street, she pulled her phone from her bag to send her brother a text.

_Breakfast tomorrow?_

When he didn't answer right away, she figured he was busy with work, maybe even out on a call. She was proud of her brother, growing up to be a fireman like their father; she was proud of Kelly too. Little did she know how much life was going to change that afternoon.

* * *

After the hour long class, Lacey started the walk back to her apartment. It was only a few blocks away, so she didn't bother with driving. She had contemplated stopping by the station to say hi, but decided against in as she walked up to her building. Heading up the stairs to her apartment, she found the door to be unlocked. Thinking she may have forgotten to lock it, she let herself in cautiously. At first she jumped when she saw someone sitting on her couch, but laughed with she saw who it was.

"Holy hell," she laughed, shutting the door and dropping her bag by it, kicking off her flip flops. "You scared me." She looked at Kelly curiously as she came into the living room, sitting on the coffee table directly in front of him. "Why aren't you still on shift?" He was back in his jeans and t-shirt from that morning.

"Um," Kelly hesitated, swallowing hard; this was killing him. "Chief, uh, went to talk to Heather...I asked to talk to you."

"About what?" Lacey asked, though she was quickly piecing it together._ No, it couldn't be_. "About Andy? Is he ok?"

"There was an accident Lace," Kelly said, trying to be gentle. "A really...bad accident while we were out on a call."

"Well, is Boden taking Heather to the hospital?" Lacey asked, hopping to her feet and trying to head for the door._ There was no way anything else could have happened._ Kelly caught her wrist though, keeping her from leaving.

"Lace," Kelly said, tears springing to his eyes.

"Oh my God," Lacey gasped, her own eyes brimming with tears as well. "No, no, no, no..." She burst into tears as Kelly pulled her into his chest to hug her tight. Her body collapsed against his as she continued to sob.

"He can't be gone," she sniffed. "He can't."

* * *

Lacey didn't feel much of anything as she was at her brother's house after the funeral, receiving people with her sister-in-law, Heather. Her nephews sat on the couch in the next room in silence, politely hugging older relatives when they came over to tell the boys how sorry they were. Eventually, Andy's youngest son Sean, got up and fled for his bedroom with tears in his eyes. As he ran up the stairs, some of the others from the station had started to file in; Kelly was among them and Heather wasn't too thrilled to see him.

"Could you..." Heather said, nodding her head at them as she made her way towards the stairs after Sean; Lacey nodded as she left.

Lacey greeted the others first, hugging them and accepting their condolences. She instructed them to the main room of the house where the others were, leaving her in the front hall alone with Kelly. By now, after Kelly had asked to be the one to speak to Lacey as well as how often he was trying to call her over the past few days, they all figured it was something a little more than him checking on his best friend's sister, but no one called him out on it.

"How are you?" Kelly finally asked after an awkward silence; he immediately regretted his choice of words. "Sorry, that was a stupid question."

"It's all right," Lacey promised, crossing her arms over herself. She knew that Heather didn't want Kelly to be there, but Lacey didn't have it in her to kick him out.

"I tried stopping by your place," Kelly said.

"I've been here," Lacey explained. She had been staying in the guest room to help Heather with everything and she planned on staying for awhile longer.

"I could have come by," Kelly offered; Lacey hadn't been returning any of his messages. "To help out or...I don't know...hug you or something?" Lacey gave a half smile at how sweet he was being.

"I'm just not sure," Lacey said hesitantly. "With, um, Heather right now...and how she's dealing..." Kelly caught on to what Lacey was trying to gently hint at. By this point, everyone knew the details of the fire.

"Do you think it's my fault?" Kelly asked softly, almost afraid of her answer.

"I think it's called an accident for a reason," Lacey said back; they could hear Heather coming back downstairs.

"I guess I should go," Kelly said, not wanting to upset Heather. He kissed Lacey once. "I'll see you later?"

"Mhmm," Lacey nodded quietly, watching him go.

**thanks for reading! hope that you liked it so far, please let me know what you thought! :)**


	2. Stages of Grief

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_Stages of Grief_

_Flashback_

It was the night before Thanksgiving and Lacey was due home the next day from her freshman year of college. Andy and Kelly were both at firehouse 51, where Kelly had recently joined rescue squad. That year, Kelly's dad was gone for the week, off on some camping trip with some of his old friends. With little family in town, Kelly got invited to spend Thanksgiving with the Darden family. Having known each other since kindergarten, Kelly was pretty much family anyway. He was having a beer with Andy and his dad, watching the Blackhawks game when they heard someone coming through the door.

"Surprise!" Lacey said from the entryway to the living room where she dropped her bag.

"Lacey!" Andy laughed, getting up to hug her; they hadn't seen each other since she left for school in August. "What are you doing back already?"

"I got an earlier flight," she grinned. "Where's your wife?"

"With your mother," their dad answered, getting up from his seat to hug his daughter. "As if they're not already making enough for tomorrow, they went out to get more pie crusts."

"I won't complain about that," Lacey laughed. She looked over to where Kelly was still seated on the couch, giving him a small wave. "Hey Kelly."

"Hey Lace," Kelly nodded at her. "How's school?"

"Good," she smiled, grabbing her bag from the ground. "I'm exhausted though, I'm gonna go lay down for a little." As she headed towards the stairs to go to her room, their dad went out to the kitchen to grab another beer. Though he didn't think he would, Andy caught Kelly leaning forward a little to check out Lacey as she walked away.

"Dude," Andy complained, smacking his friend over the head as he sat back down next to him.

"What?" Kelly asked innocently, laughing a little.

"That's my sister," Andy reminded him.

"Well, your sister got seriously hot," Kelly commented, wondering when that happened.

"Lacey's my baby sister Severide," Andy said seriously, having taken protecting Lacey seriously since the day she was born. "Not some random girl for you to pick up."

"That hurts man," Kelly said, feigning offense. "And, by the way, you sound like Heather." Andy ignored the comment.

"I'm not kidding around Kelly," Andy warned.

"I _am_," Kelly assured him, finishing his beer. "Come on man, she's your sister. I wouldn't do that."

* * *

Kelly woke up that night, the memory coming to him in a dream. It had been nearly a month since Andy's accident. He looked over to Lacey, his arm draped over her waist. This was one of only a handful of times that she had stayed over since the accident, when before she used to stay there almost every night. She wasn't doing much sleeping though and he caught her wide awake, staring up at the ceiling.

"You all right?" Kelly asked sleepily, squeezing his arm around her middle.

"Fine," Lacey nodded, though she wriggled from his grasp to sit up on her own, running a hand through her hair before turning on the light.

"What are you doing?" Kelly asked as she threw back the blankets. She pulled her shorts on under Kelly's t-shirt that she had been sleeping in.

"I should go," she said, not looking at him as she slid on her flip flops.

"It's late," Kelly protested as she grabbed her bag from the floor. He hated when she tried to leave in the middle of the night. She was pulling further and further away from him since the accident happened.

"Yeah, but I remember I told Heather I'd take Sean to the school with me since Jack has that doctor's appointment," Lacey told him.

She had started her job at the elementary school where Sean and Jack both went a week before. She had been staying with Heather and the boys at the house mostly, helping out since Andy had passed away. Heather wasn't having the easiest time adjusting, which Lacey understood. She wasn't exactly having the easiest time either, averaging three or four total hours of sleep per night.

"It's after one," Kelly continued, getting out of bed now and coming over to the door where she was preparing to go. "You shouldn't be driving."

"I'm fine Kelly," Lacey mumbled, opening the door to go.

"You've barely slept in weeks," Kelly argued, pushing it shut. He worried about her driving in the morning with how exhausted she looked, let alone at night. Some days he was surprised she didn't just drop over from being so tired.

"And I wonder why that is," Lacey snapped at him. Kelly seemed almost hurt by what she said. "God, I'm sorry," she sighed as she took her face in her hands. What was going on with her? She had been snapping at Kelly a lot lately, though she knew that nothing was his fault. Stress and sleep deprivation were starting to wear at her. "I didn't mean...you know...I just-"

"You're fine," Kelly promised, pulling her hands off her face. "Your brother, the kids, new job. No sleep? Easy for you to get stressed out." He pulled her into him, hugging her to his chest.

"I just want to go back to normal," Lacey mumbled into his chest; Kelly could feel light tears against his skin.

"Mmmm, I know," Kelly agreed, running a hand over her hair. He pulled back to look at her and she wiped at her eyes quickly to keep from crying. "If you really want to go back tonight, I can follow you." He gave her a half smile. "Or, you can stay, and I'll just get you up when I leave in the morning." He shrugged. "If you're worried about the time or something, I can run by the house and grab Sean before my shift."

"Kelly," Lacey said gently, biting her lip. The Darden house hadn't been exactly welcoming towards Kelly since the accident. The boys were happy to see him when they saw him out, running over to hug him, but Heather always hurried them by. It was evident who she was throwing the blame at.

"Right, Heather," Kelly mumbled; he shook his head like he was trying to shake it all from his memory. "Stay, please?"

"Ok," Lacey finally nodded, giving in to stay the night.

* * *

The next morning, Lacey got up with Kelly and Shay as they got ready to leave for their shift. Normally, she slept a little longer, but since she had to go back to the house to get Sean she woke up with them. By this point, Shay knew about their relationship. Lacey had shown up at the apartment a few times since the accident, her face streaked with tears as she looked for Kelly. She was the only one that knew officially though, since Kelly and Lacey were still keeping things pretty low key. It didn't seem right to let everyone know about them so soon after her brother's accident, even if it wasn't really anyone's business.

"Morning Lacey," Shay smiled at her as she came down the spiral staircase. Kelly was upstairs in the shower while Shay was at the counter eating breakfast. "You want any breakfast?"

"Nah, I'm ok, thanks," Lacey brushed it off. In all the time Lacey was spending at the apartment this past month, Shay never really saw her eat much of anything, though they ordered food with Kelly all the time.

"Nothing?" Shay asked. "Orange juice, or-"

"I'm fine," Lacey stopped her. "But thanks," she added quickly, smiling a little.

"Sure," Shay nodded, watching Lacey slip on her shoes by the door and grab her bag. "You're leaving?"

"I have to grab Sean before work," Lacey explained, opening the door.

"Aren't you going to say goodbye to Kelly?" Shay asked in confusion. He had said that Lacey had been withdrawing since Andy has passed away.

"I'll see him later," Lacey shrugged. "Bye."

"Bye," Shay shrugged back as Lacey left, finishing her cereal. Upstairs, she could hear Kelly getting out of the shower. She sighed, knowing what a hard time he was having right now, between losing his best friend and now worrying about Lacey all the time. Shay was also worried that Kelly had started to feel guilty since Andy had died, not only because of the accident but also because he had been seeing his little sister.

"Where's Lace?" Kelly asked, coming downstairs.

"Ah, she left," Shay answered honestly. "Like fifteen minutes ago or something." Kelly groaned, taking a seat at the counter next to his roommate. "Bad night?"

"She tried leaving again," Kelly explained. "In the middle of the night, just decided that she couldn't stay anymore."

"She's just having a really hard time right now," Shay said gently. "And you guys were best friends her entire life. So it's going to be hard for awhile to see you and not think about him. You know?"

"That's real comforting Shay," Kelly muttered sarcastically, wincing as he reached a hand over to rub the pain in his shoulder. "Um," he hesitated. "Did you..."

"In my bag," Shay answered grimly, not happy about the new role she had taken in helping him. He had been injured in the fire that killed Andy, hurting his shoulder pretty badly. Over the last month he had been covering up the pain with medication provided to him by his roommate.

"Have you talked to Lacey about your shoulder?" Shay asked, though she was pretty sure of the answer.

"I don't need to give her another reason to be freaked out," Kelly told her. Lacey had already worried about the firemen in her life, starting with her dad as a child and then it moved on to her brother and Kelly. Now, her worst nightmare came true and she had lost Andy. Kelly didn't want to add fuel to this by telling her that he had also gotten hurt.

* * *

Lacey pulled up to the house, picking up Sean before heading over to the school. It was still hard to be at the house. Sometimes Lacey expected Andy to come in the front door or out of the garage after fixing something on his car. Shaking her head, Lacey put on a smile for her nephew and drove him the rest of the way to the school. Since she had to be there before most of the students, he stayed in her classroom with her until his classmates started to show up in the first grade room down the hall. As they sat quietly in the room, Lacey letting Sean pull some of the paints out of the cupboard, she heard her phone start to vibrate on her desk. She expected it to be Kelly, but instead it was one of the other firemen, Matt Casey.

"Hello?" she answered, concern immediately in her voice. Why would someone else be calling her from the firehouse? "Matt, is everything ok?"

_"Fine," _he promised quickly._ "I'm not even at the house yet, I just um..."_

"What?" she asked in confusion.

_"I can't look at Andy's locker anymore,"_ Matt admitted. _"It's too hard, seeing his name on the door."_ He sighed. _"Heather won't even turn on the same street as the house, I'm wondering if you would want his stuff?"_ She didn't answer right away as she contemplated it. Lacey hadn't been to the house yet either, nor had she seen any of the other members. _"If you have lunch or something. If not-"_

"No, I will," Lacey cut him off. "My lunch is at eleven thirty, is that ok?"

_"That's perfect," _Matt told her._ "I'll see you then."_

* * *

Lacey's stomach was in knots as she parked her car outside the firehouse. Having a hard enough time as it was, she had been avoided coming here completely. She wanted his things from his locker though and if Heather wasn't going to come get it, she certainly wasn't just going to let it sit there. Twisting her hands, she made her way up the sidewalk to the entrance.

Coming into the firehouse, she immediately spotted Kelly and the others on rescue squad sitting at their usual table though none of them noticed her yet. There was another fireman there that she had never seen before and she figured it was the new candidate; he was giving a tour to a bunch of elementary school kids that were on a field trip. She swallowed hard over the lump in her throat, her heart heavy as she knew the reason they got the new kid. As she walked over towards the group, Matt came out of the rec room. As she got closer, she could hear Kelly and Matt bickering over truck versus rescue squad. In front of all those kids?

"Don't you guys ever get tired of that?" Lacey asked. They both looked over at her, with Kelly being surprised to see her there.

"Oh, hey Lacey," Matt nodded at her. "Do you, um..." He didn't know how to say it, but he pointed his thumb over his shoulder at the rec room.

"Yeah," Lacey nodded, not wanting him to say it. She went to follow him, but Kelly caught her hand gently as she attempted to just breeze by the table.

"I didn't know you were coming in," Kelly said, his eye brows scrunching up in confusion.

"It was just a last minute thing," Lacey brushed it off, taking her hand back. "Matt, um, got Andy's stuff from his locker and was going to give it to me."

"I could have gotten it for you," Kelly offered, feeling a bit defensive. In addition to Heather's blame, he was also feeling the blame on Matt's end as well. They had plenty of arguments over what went wrong that day.

"I didn't even know it was here," Lacey shrugged honestly. "I'll just talk to you later, all right?" She patted his shoulder as she walked past him to head in Matt's direction though he had already gone. It killed Kelly that he couldn't just act like a normal boyfriend around her because of their secret.

"Hey," Hadley said, getting Kelly's attention. "Don't worry about it man."

"Worry about what?" Kelly asked curiously; he figured some people may have caught on to him and Lacey and he wondered if people were going to start asking about it now.

"Casey and Lacey," he answered. "I mean, he just split up with Hallie." He shrugged. "And, either way, who goes for their friend's sister?"

"That's so wrong," one of the others on squad nodded in agreement.

"Why are you telling me this?" Kelly asked.

"I don't know," Hadley shrugged. "I figured if anyone was gonna step up and look out for Lacey it'd be you. Thought you'd be worried about someone trying to make a move on Andy's sister."

"Well, I'm not," Kelly said, a little more crossly than he meant to.

* * *

Lacey continued to twist her hands nervously as she followed Matt into the rec room. Mouch and Cruz were on the couch, watching tv. Herrmann was in the kitchen, while Dawson and Shay were sharing something at the table. When she came in, everyone noticed and gave her that same _look_. She hated getting that _look_, she had been receiving it since the funeral. It was that look that said, _poor girl lost her brother in an accident_. The _look_ didn't make her feel better, it made her feel sicker.

"I'll be right back," Matt promised, heading out of the room to go to the locker room where he had left Andy's things. Lacey nodded, giving a small polite wave to everyone else.

"Hi guys," Lacey said softly. Everywhere in this room she saw her brother.

"Hey Lacey," they all said separately, nodding at her.

"How are you doing Lacey?" Dawson asked nicely, nodding at her to sit down with her and Shay.

"Fine," Lacey answered, taking the seat. "Kinda wishing people would stop looking at me like I'm a puppy in one of those ASPCA commercials." She sighed, giving a small smile so they would know she wasn't angry or upset. "But, I uh, guess this is new territory. So..." Dawson gave a half smile back.

"So, Lacey," Herrmann jumped in, changing the subject entirely as he got her to look over. "My youngest, Katie, _loves_ being in your class. It was all she could talk about the other night."

"Good," Lacey smiled. "I'm glad. Katie's really sweet, I'm happy to have her." As she finished saying this, she noticed Matt coming back with the box. A sinking feeling in her stomach, she got up from the table as he came closer, taking it from him.

"Thanks," she said quietly, briefly glancing down at her brother's things. "I, um, gotta go. My lunch is almost over. But, uh..." She held up the box a bit. "Thanks, for these."

"You want any help with that?" Matt offered.

"No, it's fine," Lacey waved him off. She could handle the box on her own, plus Kelly might come unglued given the current status of his relationship with Matt. "I'll just see you guys later."

"Are you coming to the barbecue Saturday?" Dawson asked her.

"Oh, you should," Shay nodded in agreement. "It'll be fun."

"Um, maybe," Lacey half promised. The thought honestly hadn't even crossed her mind. "I'll let you guys know." She looked to Matt. "Thanks again."

"Sure thing," he assured her, watching her leave. Lacey attempted to just walk by Kelly's table again, but he got up to follow her out to her car. She knew that he was behind her but didn't stop as she opened the backseat of her car to put the box in gently. As she turned around, he was pretty close to standing right on top of her he was so close.

"Before you ask, I'm fine," Lacey told him, walking back around to the driver's side to get in.

"That's such a line of shit," Kelly said, following her around and shutting the door before she could get in. He was tired of her avoiding him, both at home and out around people.

"And you know that because..." Lacey said skeptically like she didn't believe him.

"You just picked up a box of your brother's things from his locker. There's no way you're fine right now."

"Then you don't know me as well as you thought," Lacey deflected.

"Did you talk to Casey about any of this?" Kelly asked her.

"Oh God," Lacey scoffed. "Please don't make me part of the pissing contest between the two of you."

"Hey, I don't even care if you're turning to him," Kelly informed her. "Because at least it means you talking to somebody." She wouldn't look at him. "Lace, you don't have to put up this front like you're dealing with it." He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "I mean, hell, I hope you're not doing it for me because I can deal with it on my own. You need to worry about you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you spend about ninety percent of your time running around worrying about things you can't fix," Kelly snapped at her, though he hadn't meant it to be mean. He only wished she spent some of her time trying to heal herself rather than Andy's wife and kids.

"Well, it feels selfish," Lacey snapped back, not noticing the tears that had started to silently spill out. "Because I can't even imagine what it's like to lose a husband or father and-"

"He was your _brother_ Lace," Kelly reasoned gently. "That's not something you can just brush off and pretend it doesn't matter."

"I can't handle it," Lacey confessed. "I can't feel that kind of sad. Because then I can't function, I can't sleep, I can't-"

"I'm here to help with that," Kelly tried telling her. Behind them, they could hear the alarm going off inside, signaling that Kelly and all the others had to leave on a call. Kelly groaned, not done with this conversation yet.

"We'll talk about it tonight, ok?" Kelly said quickly, giving her a kiss on the forehead before hurrying back inside.

"Mhmm," Lacey nodded as he left, nervous now every time he left on a call. She was afraid that intense feeling of worry was never going to go away.

**thanks for reading! hope that you liked the update :) please let me know what you thought! :)**


	3. A Piece of Happiness

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_A Piece of Happiness_

Lacey went back to the school, fixing her make up in the rear view mirror before heading back inside; she had cried almost the entire way there. Once inside with Andy's box of belongings, she sat down at her desk to look through them. Unfortunately, her next class would be coming in soon so she only got to look through a few pictures. She smiled at the first one she came across, letting it sit out on her desk as she placed the box underneath it while the kindergartners filed inside. It was a picture of her, Andy, and Kelly from Halloween when she was four and they were nine; she was a ballerina and they were, of course, firemen.

"All right guys," she smiled, getting up from her desk as they sat at their work benches, two to a table. "Who's ready for finger painting?"

"Yea!" a bunch of little voices said in unison. While everyone else was excited to start working, she noticed her nephew Sean still seated at the far table alone, not ready to join the other kids in arts and crafts. Things were still really hard at home for the Darden kids and she was doing what she could to help them get back to normal.

* * *

That night, with Kelly on shift, Lacey went back over to Heather's to spend the night with her and the boys. Inside the house seemed to reflect what everyone was feeling, somewhat disorganized and in disarray. While Heather had started furiously cleaning day and night to keep her mind off of things, there were still some aspects of the house that were falling into disrepair. The squeaking floorboard by the stairs, the leaky faucet, the broken light on the front porch. These were all things that Andy would have fixed, so Lacey knew why they were let go. For now, the boys were upstairs in bed while Lacey attempted to watch tv but Heather kept dusting and getting in her way.

"Hey," Lacey said, getting her attention. "Come on, come sit."

"Lacey, I-" Heather protested.

"For two minutes," Lacey insisted. "You can sit for two minutes." Heather sighed, going to sit next to her sister in law on the couch, watching re-runs of old sitcoms.

"So, did I tell you who I saw yesterday?" Heather asked, turning to talk to her; Lacey kept her eyes on the tv.

"Who?" Lacey asked absent mindedly. She loved Heather, she was her brother's wife, but sometimes she just couldn't listen to her anymore. Over the last month she learned that it was just better to let her rant sometimes then jump in with her own opinion on things. Tonight felt like it was going to be one of those nights.

"Kelly," Heather said, sounding disgusted at his name. Lacey kept a straight face but shifted a bit uncomfortably as she continued to watch tv.

"Did you talk to him?" Lacey asked, her voice monotone as she tried not to show that this clearly bothered her that Heather would keep acting this way towards Kelly. Even if she wasn't involved with him, she knew what happened to her brother wasn't Kelly's fault, that Kelly loved Andy just as much as them and this hurt him as well.

"Barely," Heather scoffed, turning to watch the tv now too. "Enough so he knew he was the last person I wanted to see."

"He's having a hard time too Heather," Lacey tried to reason; Heather turned to look at her again.

"Have you talked to him?" Heather asked. Lacey felt like it was a little demanding, like Heather thought she was her mother or something.

"He's been my friend my whole life," Lacey said like it was obvious; she hesitated before saying the next part. "And, it's not his fault."

"Andy wouldn't have even been a firefighter if-"

"If my _dad_ hadn't been one, not Kelly," Lacey stopped her, reminding her that both Kelly and Andy had come from a long line of firefighters. Heather seemed hurt by the comment, since Lacey was telling her she was wrong for feeling this way. "Heather, I'm sorry. I just don't think it's helping anyone to just throw the blame around."

"Well, if Kelly had just done his job then..." Heather trailed off as Lacey got up from the couch, preparing to go over towards the steps. "Where are you going?"

"My apartment," Lacey answered, quietly going upstairs to grab her things so she wouldn't wake up the boys. When she came back downstairs with her suitcase, Heather had gotten up from the couch as well to meet her at the bottom.

"This isn't helping me," Lacey told her before she could ask. "If you need me to come by and help with the boys I can, but I can't stay here anymore." Heather didn't say anything to stop her, almost like she didn't want her to stay anymore after their disagreement over the Kelly thing.

Lacey left, placing her suitcase in the back of her car before driving over to her apartment building. Parked outside, she rooted around in her bag for her key but realized that she must have left her keys in her apartment. She had Kelly's spare on a separate key ring in her purse, so she decided to go stay the night in his apartment instead.

* * *

Still on shift, Kelly sat outside that night trying to clear his head. It wasn't bad enough that he had lost someone in a building collapse earlier, it always drove him crazy when he couldn't save someone, but they also had a whiteboard meeting that day about what happened to Andy. They didn't name names, but they did say that if there was a vent in the back the fire wouldn't have killed Andy. Guilt was a hard pill to swallow.

Pulling his phone from his pocket, he opened up his contacts, his thumb hesitating over Lacey's name. He wanted to call her, but if she was finally sleeping he didn't want to disturb her. He decided against it, replacing his phone in his pocket. Instead, he got up to go inside to the bathroom where he would use more the medication from Shay to deal with his shoulder.

* * *

The next morning after their shift was over, both Shay and Kelly returned home, a little surprised to see Lacey's car parked out front. Inside, they found her asleep on the couch, her suitcase by the bottom of the stairs. She must have fallen asleep watching tv since it was still turned on. Kelly crept over and turned off the tv while Shay nodded her head at the stairs, letting her know she would leave them alone.

"Lace," Kelly said gently, shaking her shoulder to wake her up as he sat on the coffee table next to the couch. "Babe."

"Mmm?" Lacey mumbled, blinking her eyes open slowly; she smiled a little when she saw him. "Hi."

"Hey," he smiled back. "Why'd you sleep down here?"

"Couldn't sleep," she shook her head, sitting up to stretch. "Came down to watch some tv. I, um, locked myself out of my apartment so I thought I'd crash here."

"That's fine," Kelly promised her, never being bothered that she would decide to stay there. "Why didn't you stay at Heather's though?"

"Ah," Lacey hesitated, reaching for her phone on the table to check the time. "We kind of had a disagreement." Before Kelly could ask, Lacey bolted up from the couch. "God, I'm late."

"Hey," Kelly said as she went over to her suitcase, pulling out clothes to change. "Did you want to go to the barbecue tomorrow?"

"Um, yeah," Lacey nodded, finally deciding as she swapped one top for another, pulling on her skirt quickly. "Heather was going to take the boys, I wanted to make sure they did ok." She ran her fingers through her messy hair, fluffing it a little to fix it. "They're still having a hard time with this kind of stuff."

"Right," Kelly nodded in understanding. "Are you going to go with them?"

"Well, I was," Lacey said, going over to a nearby mirror to put on some make up. "But, since I'm not staying there anymore, I'll probably just meet them there."

"Do you want to go with me?" Kelly asked, broaching the subject cautiously. Since the accident they hadn't really discussed revealing their relationship to everybody.

"I mean, I'll see you there?" Lacey said in confusion, not getting what he was hinting at.

"I meant _with_ me with me," Kelly clarified, studying her expression carefully.

"Oh," Lacey said like she didn't know how to answer. "I just, um...don't know if it's the right time for it. You know?"

"Do you ever think it's going to be the right time?" Kelly asked her.

"Babe, I'm really late," Lacey told him, kissing him on the cheek. "I'll be back later tonight, ok?"

"Mhmm," Kelly nodded, watching her go. The longer they kept the secret, the more it wore at him. He wanted to be her boyfriend, he didn't think that there was anything wrong with them. But did she? The fact that she still didn't want to share with anyone worried him.

* * *

That night, Shay went out with her friends, saying she didn't know when she would be back. Kelly waited at the apartment for Lacey, watching tv and having a beer on his own. When she came back, she had brought back take out for dinner. She was trying to avoid the topic of the barbecue the next day, Kelly could tell. He obliged her at first, not wanting to argue with her as soon as she walked through the door. As they finished with dinner though and started watching a movie, he couldn't keep it bottled up anymore.

"I want you to come with me to the barbecue tomorrow," Kelly admitted to her. "As my date. My girlfriend," he clarified.

"Kelly," Lacey complained, not wanting to do this right now. She grabbed their plates from the coffee table, going to put them in the sink. Being confronted always made it impossible for her to sit still. Kelly got up to follow her, standing at the counter.

"What is so wrong with telling people?" Kelly asked curiously.

"I just don't think the barbecue is the best place to do it," Lacey reasoned.

"Why not?" Kelly continued. "They're going to find out anyway, they might as well all find out at once."

"Is what we have not good enough for you?" Lacey asked.

"Don't make this into that," Kelly protested. "Look, Lace, after what happened to Andy-"

"God, don't," Lacey stopped him. "Don't go there."

"Well, it's true," Kelly went on. "Life's too short to just let the things you want go by." Lacey didn't say anything. "Aren't you sick of only being able to see me in this apartment? Because I want to be able to take you to barbecues, to dinner, stuff like that."

"Kelly," Lacey said again. "It just doesn't seem right, the first thing after my brother's accident and we start telling people about us?"

"It's been a month," Kelly argued. "And what do you care what other people think about us?"

"It's not that," Lacey protested, though it certainly looked that way.

"Then what is it?" Kelly asked; she didn't answer again. "Look, I don't think it's wrong. I'm so tired of people making comments-"

"What kind of comments?" she interrupted.

"The other day people thought you were with Casey," he explained. "And they kept saying there was no way because _who goes for their best friend's sister_. Well, I did." He laughed a little at himself as he thought about it. "I went for my best friend's sister. And you know what Lace?" He got her to look at him. "I don't even care, because I don't think that there's anything wrong with it. I went for my best friend's sister and..." He took a breath. "And I fell in love with her."

Lacey didn't say anything at first.

This wasn't the Kelly she knew her whole life, the one she grew up with. The Kelly she knew was a bit of a ladies man, one that didn't make many commitments. She remembered in high school he had two dates to prom, one at his high school and one he kept sneaking off to at another high school down the road; Andy was amazed he got away with it. He always had various girlfriends, ones that were only around for a few weeks before they were replaced by someone else. Lacey recalled making the comment that she had cartons of milk that lasted longer. They were just messing around, having fun that summer. At least, that was what she thought. Even though they had planned to tell Andy about them, she still had never thought that Kelly had been that serious about her.

"You...what?" she finally asked.

"Um," Kelly said, trying not to let on, but Lacey could tell that her response stung; he had been hoping she would say it back. "You know what, forget I said anything."

"Kelly, I-"

"I'll just see you tomorrow," he stopped her. "Ok?"

Lacey was a little surprised. Was he kicking her out? As she thought about it though, it would be too awkward for her to stay there after that. She grabbed her bag, intending to go back to her apartment with the spare set of keys she had picked up from her landlord earlier. As she was driving though, she almost found herself involuntarily taking turns to go someplace else entirely. Eventually, she found herself sitting outside her parents' house.

"Lacey?" her mom asked when she opened the door, seeing her daughter on the stoop outside the brick house.

"I, um, didn't have my key," Lacey said as her mom let her in. Her mother, Sarah, could see that she was clearly shaken and upset about something.

"Ok," Sarah nodded, leading her into the living room to sit with her.

"Where's dad?" Lacey asked about Mark, not ready to start talking about what happened yet.

"He's upstairs," her mother explained. "Says he wasn't feeling well." She sighed a little. "I think this barbecue tomorrow has him more upset than he'll let on."

"And you?" Lacey asked curiously.

"We'll be all right honey," Sarah promised, resting a hand on hers. "Day by day, right?" Lacey was amazed by her mother's warmth and comfort when she herself had lost her own son. She figured that was part of being a mother though, helping your kids before yourself.

"I guess," Lacey nodded.

"So," Sarah said, since Lacey clearly wasn't going to bring it up on her own. "What's on your mind honey?"

"I might have," Lacey said hesitantly. "...hurt someone really important to me."

"Mmmm," Sarah nodded along.

"And I don't know what to do," Lacey went on.

"Saying sorry won't just fix it?" Sarah asked; Lacey shook her head.

"It's really complicated," Lacey tried to explain; Sarah nodded, waiting for her to continue. "I've, um, sort of been seeing this person...secretly. And now he wants to tell people...but I don't know that we should."

"Ah," Sarah nodded. "And, by _he_, you mean Kelly right?" Lacey was surprised by what her mom said.

"What?" Lacey asked curiously.

"Honey," Sarah smiled at her. "Who did you two think you were fooling?" She laughed a little. "It certainly wasn't Andy."

"Andy knew?" Lacey asked, raising her eye brows.

"Sweetheart," Sarah continued to smile at her. "Andy's known and loved you both for as long as I can remember." She laughed, recalling the events from earlier that summer. "When you two started acting so jumpy around him he knew that something was up."

"So, Andy knew?" Lacey repeated; Sarah nodded. "Why didn't he say anything?"

"I told him that you two would tell him when you were ready," Sarah explained.

"You?" Lacey asked curiously.

"Mhmm," Sarah nodded.

"Andy was just ok with it?" Lacey asked in confusion. This wasn't like the brother she had grown up with at all, the one who waited for her to come home from her first date on the front porch. This same brother had threatened her prom date, interrogated her boyfriends she brought home from college. Just letting her and Kelly get away with it didn't seem like Andy at all.

"Oh, well that's another story," Sarah chuckled, remembering how her son was about Lacey. "Andy was ready to wring Kelly's neck when he figured it out. Your dad wasn't too far behind him."

"Why...didn't he?" Lacey asked hesitantly, figuring her brother would pretty much react like that. He was one of the most caring people she knew, but when it came to protecting her he didn't mess around.

"Do you remember the Fourth of July?" Sarah asked. "We had Andy, Heather, and the kids? And some of the others from the station for the pool party?"

"I remember," Lacey answered.

"Well, your brother was ready to confront Kelly that night," Sarah explained. "But, Kelly wasn't watching the fireworks that night. He was watching you." She smiled. "Andy could tell there was something different, so then he was ok about it." She shrugged her shoulders. "He knew you two would come out with it when you were ready."

"We were going to," Lacey quickly said, trying to justify things. "We were, but then he had his accident and-"

"It's ok Lacey," Sarah promised her, taking both her hands. "Really, sweetheart, it's ok. Andy wasn't angry or upset. He was just happy that you two were happy." She squeezed her hands. "You both deserve that."

* * *

Kelly wasn't really in any mood to be at this barbecue today, not after what happened last night with Lacey. There were several picnic tables, the firefighters from the station spread out among two of them, coming back and forth with food and drinks. Heather had just gotten there with the boys, not even looking over in Kelly's direction. He noticed Lacey wasn't with them and wondered if she planned to come at all now. He got up from the table, heading over to grab another beer. Not seeing her come over at first, Kelly was a little surprised when he felt someone touching his arm.

"Hey," Lacey said, getting him to turn towards her.

"Um, hey," Kelly said, tossing the cap from his beer in the nearby trash. "Didn't know if you were going to decide to show or not."

"I got invited by this guy I like to be his date," Lacey said lightly. "This, um, guy I love actually." A smile spread across his face as he heard her say it. Things were hard right now and their relationship was confusing, he knew that so he tried to understand how she must have felt. Now, he was just happy to have her say it back.

"I hope that's still ok."

"Yeah. Of course," Kelly smiled, holding his free hand out for her to take. Lacey took his hand, intertwining her fingers with his; it felt right. He lead her back over to the tables were everyone else was sitting. She felt everyone looking at them, seeing the surprised looks on their faces as her and Kelly walked hand in hand, but she didn't care.

"Hey guys, over here," Shay waved them over, happy that they finally decided to let the secret out. Kelly was her best friend, she saw how the secret was eating at him. She really liked Lacey too and wanted them both to be happy.

"I'm so happy you came!" Shay said to Lacey, getting up to hug her. Since Lacey had started coming over more, rather than sneaking over, the two had gotten to be pretty close. Lacey hugged her with one arm, still holding Kelly's hand with the other. "Corrine," Shay was saying to the girl she brought with her. "You already met my roommate Kelly, right?"

"Yeah," Corrine smiled at him. "How are you Kelly?"

"Good," Kelly nodded at her. "Corrine, this is my girlfriend Lacey." It felt so good to say, to introduce her this way. There were a few _I knew it_s coming from nearby tables, making Lacey blush a little. Apparently, more people knew than she thought.

"Well, it's nice to meet you Lacey," Corrine grinned. "Come on, sit!" Lacey sat down first as the others scooted over to make room for her and Kelly. "Kelly, you could at least get your girl a beer."

"Right, what was I thinking," Kelly joked, handing Lacey the beer that he had. "I'll be right back."

"K," she nodded as he kissed her head before leaving.

Most of the looks she was getting didn't make her feel uneasy. People were a bit surprised but seemed generally indifferent or, really, just happy for them. There were a few glances she was getting though that made her feel somewhat uncomfortable, the main one coming from Heather a few tables over. Right now though, she didn't care. All Lacey wanted was to be happy with Kelly. Her mom was right, they did deserve to be happy.

**thanks for reading! hope you liked it :) please let me know what you thought, more soon!**


	4. Conflict

**thanks so much for the reviews, follows, and favorite! glad to know you're enjoying the story. hope you like this update :) **

_Conflict _

The barbecue had been great. Kelly felt so at ease, putting his arm around Lacey, acting like a couple. Lacey was happy now as well, able to relax and just let herself be happy with her boyfriend. No one had anything but nice things to say to Kelly, though Lacey was a different story. While Heather didn't come directly out to say it, she did cancel the plans she had to leave the boys with Lacey the next day. It stung, but Lacey hoped that she would get over it eventually.

While Kelly was thrilled that he got to start acting like Lacey's boyfriend in public now, he was also happy to finally get her alone that night. After stopping by her place to grab a few things and leave her car, Kelly drove them both back to his place which was still empty for now as Shay was still out with Corrine. He carried her bag for her up the spiral staircase, barely shutting the door to his room before he started kissing her.

"I'm happy we're out too," Lacey giggled between kisses as they fell back against his bed. She was glad that he was happier now, that their secret relationship was something that would no longer weigh on them both. Kelly smiled, leaning down to kiss her again as he held himself over her.

"Ah," Kelly winced, pulling back and reaching for his shoulder. His pain had been getting worse and worse since the accident; _this_ had never been an issue before.

"Are you all right?" Lacey asked in concern, propping herself up on her elbows as Kelly sat up.

"Mmmm, yeah," Kelly said, though he continued to grimace as he massaged his shoulder. "I think I just pinched a nerve or something at the gym."

"Do you want some ibuprofen?" Lacey asked as she rolled herself off the bed, going over to grab her bag and rummaging through it.

"No, Lace, really," Kelly said as she continued to look through her purse; this wasn't how he had wanted to spend his night with her. "I'll be fine."

"That is so weird," Lacey continued, digging through every part of her bag before giving up. "I just bought a bottle of ibuprofen the other day." Kelly knew that, considering her now nearly empty bottle of medication was currently sitting in his locker down at the station. He had been taking the ibuprofen to help with the pain in between doses of medication from Shay.

"Maybe you left it in your desk or something," Kelly offered as she came back over towards the bed, concern still in her eyes. "Really, I'm ok Lace."

"Well," she said with a smile, trusting in what he told her. She kissed him once as she got back into bed with him, hinting for him to lay back. "Maybe you shouldn't put any weight on it."

"Whatever you say," he laughed, pulling her down into another deep kiss.

* * *

Shay was up the next morning, eating breakfast alone when Kelly came downstairs with his gym bag. It was Sunday morning, so he was going to let Lacey sleep in while he tried to go to the gym; she still wasn't having the best time sleeping at night. While she was able to fall asleep now, she continued to wake up with dreams about Andy. She hadn't told Kelly that some of them involved him too. Once she had one, she had a hard time getting back to sleep.

"Mornin'," Kelly greeted his roommate, dropping his bag by the door before coming over and grabbing a piece of fruit.

"Hey," Shay nodded back, finishing with her yogurt. "Lacey stay over last night?" Kelly nodded, wincing a little as he reached over to rub his shoulder. "Kelly-"

"Hey guys," Lacey smiled as she came down the spiral staircase. Kelly gave Shay a warning look before turning to smile at Lacey as she came over, giving him a quick kiss before she sat next to Shay at the counter.

"How's your shoulder babe?" Lacey asked him, pouring herself some orange juice.

"Better," he lied to her. "I thought you'd still be sleeping, I was going to head over to the gym for an hour."

"Are you sure you should?" she asked, sipping at her juice. "I mean, if you just pinched a nerve over there, should you be going back so soon?" Shay was giving Kelly a _look_, one that showed a bit of disappointment. Not only did Lacey think that this was a new injury, but she thought it was from going to the gym as well. How long did he think he could keep this from her, especially if he was only getting worse and refusing to get help?

"You know, Kelly," Shay jumped in. "My friend Kendra over at the hospital could look at your shoulder real quick. Give you a consult and everything. Maybe after our next shift?"

"Oh, that would be a good idea," Lacey nodded in agreement. Kelly shot Shay a _look_ back, their silent communication in effect.

"Really, girls, it's fine," Kelly promised them both, though he knew Shay wasn't believing a word of it. "I'm gonna go, I'll be back soon." He went over to Lacey's chair to kiss her once. "Love you."

"You too," Lacey smiled as he headed for the door, grabbing his bag as he planned to leave.

"And I love you!" Shay joked, calling after him as he waved her off and headed out the door. Lacey laughed a little at what Shay said, turning back to her juice at the counter. As she set her glass down though, she became more serious.

"Is Kelly ok?" Lacey asked Shay.

"What do you mean?" Shay asked, concerned now as well. Had Lacey started to notice what was going on with him?

"I just," Lacey said hesitantly. "I know he was bothered by the whole Heather thing yesterday. He doesn't really talk to me about her, or Andy, or any of..._that_." She shook her head. "I think he thinks he'll upset me? But I'm just worried with how he's dealing."

Shay sighed, rubbing her forehead. She wasn't sure what to do. After all, she was getting really worried about Kelly who was refusing to get help for his worsening pain. Kelly was her best friend though and he didn't want Lacey to know about what happened to him. Was it really her place to tell Lacey about it?

"What?" Lacey asked once Shay had sighed, picking up that something else might be wrong.

"Kelly didn't hurt his shoulder at the gym the other day," Shay said quickly, getting it out before she changed her mind. Maybe Lacey knowing would finally force him to get the help for his shoulder that he needed because nothing she said to him seemed to make a difference.

"What do you mean?" Lacey asked curiously.

"He hasn't wanted to tell you," Shay continued. "It's like you said, he didn't want you to be upset. But...he hurt himself last month, um, in the accident."

"The one with Andy?" Lacey asked softly; Shay nodded.

"I'm sorry," Shay apologized, though she wasn't sure what for. She wasn't the one that had been keeping a secret from her. "And, really, don't be mad at him. He was just really worried about you."

"Mhmm," Lacey said, though she had rested her elbows on the counter, taking her face in her hands as she thought about what was going on. Kelly had been keeping a big secret from her for over a month. She understood why he did it, but it was dangerous for him to continue to be in pain like this. And, really, she wondered if she had been pushing him away, if he felt like he couldn't tell her. That made her feel even worse.

Going upstairs to change, she waited downstairs for him to come back, flipping through the tv channels aimlessly. Shay had gone out again for the day as she had plans with Dawson, leaving Lacey alone for when Kelly came back. It wasn't intentional, she certainly wouldn't take back telling Lacey because she knew that Kelly needed help, but she also figured that the new couple needed time by themselves to talk about what was going on with him. Kelly finally came back, having showered at the gym. He wasn't feeling much of anything right now, as he had just used the last of the medication Shay had given him after his workout.

"Hey babe," he greeted her with a smile, observing her in her deep blue sundress as he came over to kiss her. "Let me go change real quick, and we can go do whatever." He continued to smile since they got to leave the apartment for the day. He started over towards the stairs. "We can see a movie, or go down to the pier, or-"

"Why didn't you tell me about your shoulder?" Lacey cut him off, causing him to stop at the bottom of the stairs. Kelly groaned internally, dropping his bag. _Shay_. Looking over at Lacey again, she was giving him a look like she was expecting a really good answer, like she had been hurt that he was lying to her.

"I didn't want you to worry about it," Kelly said honestly, coming over to the couch and standing in front of her. "It's not that big of a deal Lace, I promise."

"Yeah, but this isn't a new injury," Lacey insisted, getting up from the couch now to stand. "This isn't just something you did the other day at the gym, this happened a month ago. And it's obviously only getting worse." She sighed, crossing her arms. "Why would you keep this from me?"

"Because Lace," Kelly said, his tone implying that it was obvious. "You think I don't notice when you're up all night, pacing around the apartment? I know you're still not sleeping, you still can't relax." Lacey opened her mouth to say something, but Kelly continued knowing that came out wrong. "And I don't blame you for that," Kelly promised. "I just...didn't want to add to it."

"Does it hurt you when you're at work?" Lacey asked.

"Lace, c'mon," Kelly complained, running a hand through his hair. "Don't do this, don't make yourself wor-"

"Well, I am worried," Lacey argued, knowing what he was going to say. "What if you're on the ladder, or carrying someone, or...God, Kelly, what if you fall or something because-"

"Lacey," Kelly stopped her. "Seriously, it's just a pain management thing. I didn't take anything last night, that's why my shoulder was bothering me." It wasn't a complete lie, he hadn't taken anything for the pain last night. However, it was more than just pain management as, sometimes, he was having trouble holding onto things, the numbness spreading through his arm.

"But Shay-"

"Is a paramedic," Kelly said with a slight smile, though he was less than thrilled that she had told Lacey about this. "It's in her job description to be worried about stuff like this."

"I'm your girlfriend," Lacey added. "It's my job too."

"I know, but babe," Kelly said, getting her to uncross her arms so he could take one of her hands. "Really, I promise, it's fine." He tugged on her hand to bring her closer to him as she had been a bit standoffish during this conversation.

"Will you go to the doctor?" Lacey finally asked.

"If it gets any worse," Kelly lied. He didn't plan to go to the doctor at all. What if it was really bad and he had to give up being a firefighter? He would rather just fight through it. "But, baby, really it's fine." He smiled as he put his hands on her waist. "Your guy's pretty tough." He studied her expression and she didn't seem totally convinced on the situation. "Lacey," he groaned. "C'mon, I promise it's fine. Let's just have fun today, all right? We can do whatever you want."

"Ok," Lacey nodded, though she was still skeptical. She would certainly be watching him more closely now, that was for sure. She didn't want to fight with him on this anymore today though, believing him when he said that he was fine. He wouldn't lie to her face after being confronted like this. Right?

"Ok," Kelly agreed with a grin, kissing her once before releasing her. "I'll go get ready, then we can head out. Want to crash at your place tonight?" Part of him felt bad that they never spent the night at her apartment, that she was pretty much only there when she needed a change of clothes. Another part of him didn't want either of them to be there when Shay got back, not needing this confrontation to have a part two.

* * *

Kelly and Lacey had a great afternoon out, especially once Lacey let that morning's conflict go. It was their first day out as a couple, just the two of them. They took advantage of it, indulging in a little PDA when they never could before. As he put his arm around her though, she couldn't help but think about what was wrong with his shoulder.

That night, it was apparent that what was going on was still bothering her. Kelly woke up in the middle of the night when he felt Lacey tossing in her sleep, mumbling at first but then she started talking more loudly. She was talking about him, or to him really, saying his name as her voice was filled with panic. Realizing that she was having a nightmare, Kelly tried waking her up.

"Lacey," Kelly said gently, trying to get her to stop tossing and turning.

"Mmm, no," Lacey protested. "Kelly..."

"I'm right here," he said, trying to wake her up still.

"Kelly."

"Lace," Kelly said, a little more loudly this time to wake her. Jolted from her sleep, Lacey snapped awake with a gasp, sitting up quickly. "Hey, hey, it's ok," Kelly immediately assured her as she looked around for him. He realized now that her nightmares weren't exclusive to Andy anymore as he was rubbing her back. "I'm right here." Lacey took a deep breath, trying to relax herself as she squeezed her eyes shut to try to get rid of the memory of her dream; it wasn't working.

"Kelly, I-"

"I know," he stopped her, already knowing what her nightmare was about as he kissed her head. "And, I'll go this week, to see Shay's friend. Ok?" If going to see the doctor would put her mind at ease, he was going to do it. He still planned to just fight through the pain, this doctor's visit was more for her benefit, but he was willing to do it.

"It's all right," Kelly promised, trying to get her to relax. She finally laid back down with him and he pulled her close, her head resting against his chest. He was careful not to shift her too close to his shoulder, the pain flaring up again but he ignored it for now. "Everything's fine."

Lacey wasn't convinced, remaining wide awake that night as she heard Kelly peacefully drift back into sleep, his breathing slow and rhythmic. She was used to having this kind of worry, having always been worried about her dad when she was a child. In elementary school, she had a few friends lose their fathers that way as she had been friends with most of the kids who's fathers worked at the same station. She worried about Andy as well when her father retired and Andy had just started, though that went away. None of the dreams she had were ever this bad or happened this often; they had been coming on more and more since the accident that claimed her brother. Now, they seemed to spread and be about Kelly as well.

* * *

"Hey," Kelly said the next day as he passed Shay in the hall on shift, this being the first he had seen her. He had left Lacey's that morning, with her looking like hell as she got ready to go to work. While he had gone right back to bed, it seemed pretty obvious that she hadn't fallen back asleep. "Thanks a lot Shay."

"I was just trying to help," Shay said back. "You obviously aren't going to get any help on your own."

"Well, you didn't help Lacey any," Kelly snapped at her. "She's sleeping even less now, if that's even possible."

"Kelly, I'm sorry if she's upset," Shay apologized. "That wasn't what I wanted. But you have to understand how dangerous-" She was cut off as the alarm started going off at the station.

_Accident. Truck 81, Squad 3, Ambulance 61..._

"Better get going," Shay said, though the two of them had already started moving.

* * *

Matt Casey knew it had to be a pretty bad accident for all three of them to get called, and he was pretty used to that. He wouldn't say that he was numb to these situations, they always got his heart racing, but it wasn't anything that was going to make his stomach drop on sight. At least, not until they pulled up first onto the scene of this accident and he saw who's car it was.

"Oh God," Casey murmured, recognizing the car immediately. "Cruz, park it this way," he motioned, having him park sideways so anyone coming up wouldn't see the accident.

"We're going to block off everyone else," Cruz said, though he obliged and parked that way anyway.

"That's the point," Casey said, hopping out of the truck. "You and Otis, focus on the other driver. Hermann, you're with me. You guys clear the scene. And, Mills?" He turned to the young, still inexperienced candidate. "You're going to have to keep Severide back, all right?"

"But, uh, why would I-" Mills started to ask, still intimidated by Kelly. In any case, why would he stop the head of the rescue squad from helping out at the accident, a head on collision involving a pick up truck and a white sedan?

"That's his girlfriend's car," Casey snapped at him, before turning to go without any other explanation. By now, everyone else on truck saw who it was, the ambulance just getting there. "Lacey," Casey said, going over to her car where she had already had her window rolled down.

"The other driver's fine," he heard someone saying as he reached to feel Lacey for a pulse as she was unconscious. Thankfully, she had one. There was no way he was going to be able to make another trip to her and Andy's parents like he had last month to tell them that they had lost their daughter now as well. Boden had gone to see Heather, and Kelly had gone to see Lacey. Being such good friends with Andy, he asked to speak to his parents, both of them knowing what happened as soon as they saw him on their front step.

"She just drifted over into my lane," the other driver, an older man was explaining, panicking a little because he was technically the one that hit her. "I don't know what happened."

"What do we have?" Dawson asked as her and Shay hurried over with a board, not seeing who it was at first.

"Oh my God," Shay gasped as the others opened Lacey's car door for them. The damage was mostly to the front of her car and the windshield as well, so the door was fairly easy to pry open. While she had a pulse, she still wasn't moving. There was blood on her, her dress, her seat as they removed her from the car... Shay and Dawson were careful as always, maybe even extra careful, as they got Lacey onto the board after putting her in a neck brace. As they were working, Casey could hear Kelly on the other side of the truck, arguing with Mills.

"What the hell is going on Casey?" Kelly demanded as Casey came back around the other side of the truck to talk to him. "Nice park job by the way."

"Severide," Casey tried to say, taking him a step to the side.

"Look, if you already have it handled, fine," Kelly shrugged. "But having your candidate block me off is really-"

"It's Lacey," Casey blurted out quickly. All of the color drained from Kelly's face, his eyes widening a little.

"What?" Kelly managed to say, his voice quiet. "You gotta let me-" As he was saying this, he attempted to move by Casey, who not only blocked him off but put a hand on him to stop him. All he managed to see was some of the wreckage, which was more than enough to make his heart race out of control. "Listen, if it was Hallie-"

"I'd want you to keep me out of it," Casey stopped him again. It was true, going over in this state Kelly wouldn't be helping anything, he would only add to the panic. While they normally kept calm in these situations, this accident was different for them. This was Andy's sister, Kelly's girlfriend. She was part of their extended firehouse family, just like everyone else's wives, girlfriends, and children.

"Casey, seriously," Kelly warned, seeing Shay and Dawson taking Lacey into the ambulance. He didn't really see her at a distance to know what kind of injuries she might have, but he knew who the brunette on the board was. "Get out of my way."

"He's right," Kelly heard Chief Boden saying, feeling his hand on his shoulder. He didn't say it, but Kelly being there was a huge conflict of interest. Had they known, he never would have been allowed on scene. "C'mon, I'll take you over to Lakeshore, all right?"

"Chief, she's-" Kelly felt like his heart was about to pound right out of his chest, feeling sick at the thought of Lacey being in the twisted wreckage behind the truck.

"In very capable hands," Chief Boden stopped him, both gently but firmly at the same time to show that he was very sympathetic but he wasn't giving in on this. "Let's get out of here."

**thanks for reading! hope you liked the update though it was a bit of a cliffhanger there at the end lol please let me know what you thought! :)**


	5. Things That Break

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_Things That Break_

In his adult life, Kelly could only really recall breaking down twice. The first was when his mother died a few years ago, having been sick for so long. Andy had caught him back then, taking him out later that night to talk it out like friends do. The second was when Andy had died. Lacey had caught him that time in the bathroom, the water running to mask the sound; he had been trying to hold it together for her that whole time. And now, as he imagined Lacey in that twisted mess that was once her car, he felt the tears spring up again but he quickly blinked them away. After all, he hadn't lost her yet.

With another call coming in now, Boden left Kelly off by the emergency room entrance, Kelly racing inside, practically falling over out of his door. He noticed Shay and Dawson already running out, out on the other call, maybe another accident with someone else's girlfriend; he couldn't help but wonder. Shaking the thought from his mind, Kelly walked up to the nurses station.

"Hi," he said feeling a bit breathless. He wasn't sure if it was the running or the situation, maybe a little of both. "I need to know what's going on with a patient that was just brought in here. Lacey Darden. She was in a-"

"Are you her family?" the nurse asked him, her dark hair pulled back, her scrubs deep blue.

"I'm her boyfriend," Kelly clarified. "But, she was in a car accident. I just need-"

"I'm sorry," the nurse informed him. "I'm not allowed to release patient information to non family members."

"Are you serious?" Kelly snapped at her. "Look, her parents are in Florida right now and her brother-"

"Just got here," Casey said coming up to the nurses station and placing a hand on his friend's shoulder. He hadn't been far behind Kelly, having seen Kelly's face as they left the accident scene; Kelly was going to need support during this.

"I'm Lacey's step brother, Matt Casey," he lied as an introduction to the nurse. "Could you tell us what's going on with her?" While he hadn't been friends with Andy nearly as long as Kelly had, he did really love and miss him. With his closeness to Andy came a love for his family, making him care a lot about Lacey.

"I'll go speak with her doctor right now," the nurse assured them both, turning and going back to where she had spotted the attending ER doctor.

"Thanks," Kelly said to Casey, though he hadn't taken his eyes off the nurse as she moved over to the doctor, talking in low voices, occasionally glancing over at them. It didn't help anything, it only made him feel more nervous. The doctor was nodding, seeming to agree to come over since he followed the nurse back to the desk.

"You're here with Miss Darden," he observed, coming over to them. Before Kelly could ask, he started explaining. "I had her taken to the OR, she's in very capable-"

"What's going on with her?" Kelly demanded, tired of hearing about how Lacey was in such capable hands.

"It's very common, with head on collisions, to have a spleen laceration," the doctor explained. "When that occurs, there can be an internal bleed, which is our greatest concern right now." He sighed. "We're going to have to remove the organ, repair the bleeding. She'll need a transfusion for the blood she's lost." He studied Kelly's face for some kind of reaction. Kelly only seemed to be waiting for more news on his girlfriend. "In addition to that, just from observation, it looks as if her wrist is broken, she'll need some stitches for a few cuts." He ran a hand through his graying hair. "She's lucky her window was down, otherwise, she might have hit her head."

"Do you know what happened?" Kelly asked. "Did the other driver swerve over, or-"

"I'm not sure," the doctor said patiently, though he had other people he had to see. "I'm sorry, I have to..."

"It's all right," Matt waved him off, indicating that he would talk to Kelly about what happened. After talking to the other driver and seeing the scene of the accident, plus hearing a few whispers from Dawson and Shay about what was going on at home, he was pretty sure what caused Lacey's accident.

"What?" Kelly asked immediately, looking his friend over. "Was it brakes or something?"

"I know Lacey's been having...a hard time," Matt started out gently. "I know, since Andy, you've both been dealing with a lot..." Though he knew Kelly had to know, that he would find out eventually, he was stalling because he didn't know how to say it.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Kelly asked in confusion, a bit frustrated. "Yeah, she's had a couple nightmares, but that has nothing to do with this."

"She fell asleep while she was driving," Matt explained. "That's why she drifted over into the other lane."

Kelly didn't say anything, he only took it in slowly, running a hand through his hair. Lacey had been wearing herself thin for weeks, worrying about her nephews, about Heather, about him. She wasn't sleeping, she could never stay asleep without thinking about him in some accident like her brother. He could see it in her, how run down and worn out she was. There were bags under her eyes, she was pale in her face. Hell, he would even argue with her about this, when she would try to leave in the middle of the night.

"Ah," Kelly sighed, unsure of what his next move was supposed to be. Lacey was still upstairs in surgery. "I should, um, call her parents. And Heather."

"I can do that," Matt offered.

"No, I need to," Kelly shook his head, pulling his phone out. "You should, um, catch up on that call or..." He had no idea what to say, what to do. His girlfriend, the woman he loved, was upstairs in the operating room right now with internal bleeding. There was no need for experience in this field to know how serious that was. Unfortunately, in his time, he had come across a lot of internal bleed victims.

"I got assigned here," Matt said with a half smile, resting a hand on his friend's shoulder. There was no way Kelly should be left alone right now, everyone knew that. He nodded over at the waiting room. "C'mon, let's go."

* * *

Kelly couldn't sit, not in the cold plastic chairs of the waiting room. "He got up, walking from one side to the next. They were the only ones in there, him and Casey. Matt was sitting in a chair, not saying anything to Kelly, just letting him be because he knew he would be just as bad, that there wouldn't be anything for anyone to say to him if it were Hallie. The silence, however, was starting to eat at them both, making them even more nervous as they waited for Lacey to get out of surgery.

"So, um," Casey started off saying. "Did you get a hold of her parents?" Kelly nodded.

"They're on their way to the airport, on standby," Kelly said, crossing his arms as he kept pacing.

"She's a tough girl man," Casey said of Lacey, trying to make Kelly feel better though it didn't seem to help.

"Mmm, I know," Kelly sighed, taking a seat next to Casey now. He ran a hand through his hair, smiling a little as a memory came to him.

"What is it?"

"I, uh, remember coming here with Andy and our dads," Kelly explained. "We were five. It was when Lacey was born."

"Known her a long time," Casey commented and Kelly nodded.

"And I just realized how amazing she is in the last few months," Kelly sighed, scratching his head. "It's not enough time...not as much as I want..."

"Hey, don't say stuff like that," Casey insisted. "Look, there's the nurse now." Kelly got up, anxiously awaiting the news that the nurse had about Lacey.

"Her surgery went well," she assured them both and Kelly let out a sigh of relief. "They're going to take her in to recover, then she'll need a cast. I can let you know when she's in her room."

"Thank you," Kelly said, feeling a weight come off as he knew she was ok.

* * *

Lacey woke up the next day, slowly and groggily. After her successful surgery, they had taken her to a hospital room where she was still somewhat sedated from the pain medication after her surgery. Now, as the doctors took the sedation away, she was beginning to wake up, remembering what happened in bits and pieces. She remembered closing her eyes, just for a second, like she was blinking. Then there was the loud noise, a car horn blaring at her. A flash, then nothing. Coming to grips with where she was, Lacey realized that she must have been in an accident, the heaviness on her left wrist letting her know it was broken and in a cast; in addition to that, her entire body ached with different pains. Bruises, cuts, bumps, some sharp pain in her side...

"Hey there," she heard a familiar voice saying. She looked up, her eyes adjusting to the lights, and she spotted Matt in the doorway to her hospital room, holding a vase full of multi-colored daises. "Ah, everyone at the station threw in," Matt explained, setting them on the table. "Dawson picked 'em out." He nodded over at Kelly, who was passed out in the chair next to her bed, his head tilted back and his breathing heavy.

"He hasn't moved since they got you in here," Matt told her as Lacey slowly turned her head on her pillow to look at Kelly. "I can get him, before I head back?" It came out more like a question than an offer; Lacey nodded, still feeling extremely weak. Matt went over towards the chair, patting Kelly on the shoulder, causing him to jump awake.

"What?" Kelly asked, looking around. He had been on high alert since they brought Lacey here, waiting for something to possibly be wrong. He was pleasantly surprised, however, to see her awake. "Lacey, hey," he said quickly, taking her good right hand, kissing the back of it before rubbing it between both of his. Matt had backed out, wanting to leave the couple alone. Kelly got up from his seat a little, leaning over to kiss Lacey, being very careful. He had been so afraid that he'd never get to kiss her again, to hold her again, talk to her...

"Mmm," she smiled against his lips, her voice soft. She knew he had probably been going crazy with worry, she knew that she would have; she wanted to make things lighter. "I wish I could always wake up like this."

"Really?" Kelly asked, settling back into his chair that he pulled a little closer, still hold her hand. "Because I'm kinda hoping you never wake up like _this_ again." Lacey sighed, knowing they were going to have to talk about it.

"I was in an accident," Lacey finally said out loud, and Kelly nodded. "Where?"

"On your way to work," Kelly answered, squeezing her hand. Lacey realized quickly who must have been called to the scene, given what district her school was in.

"Oh no," Lacey shook her head, starting to feel panic though she didn't know why; everything was ok now. "Were you the ones that..." She trailed off as he nodded quietly. "God, Kelly, I'm sorry. I can't even-"

"No, babe," Kelly shook his head now, squeezing her hand. "Don't go there, all right?"

"What happened?" Lacey asked, not really remembering the full extent of the accident.

"You, um," Kelly said, taking a breath as he kissed her hand again, just so grateful that she was ok. "Baby, you fell asleep." Lacey's head sank back into her pillow. This sleep issue was taking a greater hold on her life. It had almost killed her.

"What, uh," Lacey said, blinking away tears, a mix of sadness and pain. "What's all wrong...with me?"

Kelly explained to her the full extent of her injuries, the broken wrist and bleeding, the injury to her spleen and it's removal. The doctors planned on keeping her for a few days, then it would still be a week until she could return to work. During that time, Kelly told her that he had already texted Shay and that Lacey was going to be staying with them. He also admitted to her that he had made an appointment with Shay's friend Kendra later that week to check out his shoulder; anything to give her peace of mind.

* * *

The week at the hospital passed slowly, with Lacey's parents arriving quickly from Florida to see their daughter and Heather bringing the boys by once to see their aunt. Since the accident, she knew that she couldn't keep the boys from Lacey anymore, that anything could happen at anytime so she agreed that, once Lacey was better, she would have them with her more often.

That afternoon, Kelly was carrying Lacey's bag for her to his apartment. He wanted her to stay with him for a lot of reasons, he wanted to be able to take care of her, not to mention that she just had surgery and her building didn't even have an elevator. As they got inside, they heard Shay upstairs as Kelly set Lacey's bag over by the bottom of the stairs.

"Couch," he ordered and she rolled her eyes playfully, hauling herself over there. She was much better now, though she still had the stitches in her side from her surgery, the cast on her wrist. The other bruises and cuts on her body, however, had faded. Wearing Kelly's gray hoodie over a pair of black leggings, she collapsed on the couch after setting her purse on the coffee table.

"You're bossy," she commented from where she was laying and he came over, smiling a little as he sat next to her on the edge.

"Do you need anything?" Kelly asked her.

"Mmmm," Lacey contemplated, smiling as she took his hand, pulling him closer to kiss him. "I can think of something."

"Lace," Kelly laughed as she kissed him again. "Shay's right upstairs."

"Then, let's go to your room," she said like it was obvious.

"Babe," he continued, sitting up away from her. "You're just really..." He struggled for the words. "Delicate right now."

"Oh please," Lacey rolled her eyes. "I'm _fine_."

"Yeah?" Kelly asked with raised eye brows. "Sit up."

"Sit up?" Lacey scoffed and he nodded. "Fine, I'll..." As Lacey tried to sit up, the pain in her side took over and she collapsed back, wincing.

"Yeah," Kelly said, grabbing the large bottle of percocet that Hallie had prescribed for her for the pain, between her broken wrist and her surgery. "Take one of these, all right?"

"I hate them," Lacey complained. They gave her one that morning as she was leaving the hospital and she had gotten sick from it.

"It'll make you feel better," Kelly said, wishing he could take one himself. He had gone to see Kendra that morning before taking Lacey home and learned the seriousness of his injury, though he continued to play it off to Lacey like it was nothing, that the doctor said it was nothing and she shouldn't worry. Since he had gone to see the doctor, she believed him.

"I'm gonna go get dinner," Kelly said, with them agreeing on pizza before they got home. "Are you sure you don't need anything?"

"Yes!" Lacey insisted, smiling again. It was sweet, but she didn't want him to keep worrying about her, hovering so much. "Just...go get me pizza."

"Ok," Kelly laughed, kissing her forehead. "Love you."

"You too," Lacey said and they noticed Shay coming downstairs from her room now.

"Pizza Shay, you in?" Kelly asked as she walked by, looking upset.

"Ah, yeah, sure whatever," she nodded, heading into the kitchen.

"Ok," Kelly said in confusion, watching her pull out her vodka from the lower cabinet. "Watch my girl for me, all right?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Shay agreed, not really listening as she got out a glass. Kelly and Lacey exchanged a shrug as he left to go get dinner for the three of them. Lacey turned her head over to where Shay was pouring herself a drink. Managing to sit up slowly, Lacey got up from the couch and went over to the counter.

"So," she said hesitantly as Shay started drinking. "You, um, want to tell me what's wrong?"

* * *

The pizza place took longer than expected, but Kelly eventually came back with two pizza boxes, one pepperoni, one cheese. As he opened the apartment door, he found Lacey and Shay sitting together on the couch. Shay was sitting with her head against Lacey's shoulder and Lacey rested her head on top of Shay's as they were talking, not noticing Kelly at first.

"Clarice just," Shay went on. "She's _so_ different now." _Oh God, not Clarice,_ Kelly thought to himself. She must have had a run in with Shay, the first time since they split up. "Ugh, break ups suck."

"Definitely," Lacey agreed. "Things just shouldn't break." She took another drink. "Things that break suck. Hearts..." She giggled a little. "Spleens." Shay let out a laugh too.

"Amen," Shay agreed, clinking glasses with her and they both drank.

"What, uh," Kelly laughed, getting them to look over though they continued to sit with their heads together. "What's going on?"

"Shay's sad," Lacey answered, patting her hand. He could tell they were both drunk. "So I drank with her."

"Lacey is _so_ nice Kelly," Shay told him, then pointed at him. "Don't make her sad."

"Ah, I won't," Kelly chuckled, setting the pizza boxes down on the coffee table before looking at Lacey with concern. "Should you really be drinking with those pain killers babe?"

"I didn't take any," Lacey shook her head. "They're gross. Just..." She thought about what to do. "Take them back to the pharmacy...or throw them out..." She started laughing. "Sell them or whatever." Shay started cracking up with her as well. "Are you..."

"Picturing him," Shay nodded as they both continued to laugh hysterically over the idea of Kelly dealing drugs.

"I'll get some plates," Kelly said as the girls kept laughing, taking Lacey's medication over to the counter without notice. "And _water_."

"Boo," both girls protested.

"Oh my God," Kelly heard Shay saying as he pulled out three plates from the cabinet. "I never signed your cast!"

"Oh my God, you _should_!" Lacey nodded with her, making Kelly laugh to himself, getting water for the three of them. As Shay went over to the other room to look for a marker, he quickly opened the bottle of percocet, pouring two into his hand to take. If Lacey didn't want them, then what was the harm?

"All right," Kelly said, balancing the three glasses on the plates as he carried them over. "Who's hungry?"

**thanks for reading! hope you liked the update :) more soon!**


	6. Best Kept Secret

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_Best Kept Secret_

Kelly woke up the next morning, the pain in his shoulder waking him. He got up to grab another percocet, hiding the bottle in the bottom of his gym bag. Going downstairs to get a glass of water, he took the pills before heading back upstairs where Lacey had already started to stir. She wasn't awake, but tossing like she was about to wake up.

"What are you doing?" Lacey grumbled, her eyes shut still as the light hurt too much. Since her and Shay's party for two the night before, she was pretty hung over this morning, a pounding in her head and nausea over taking her.

"Thought you might want some water," Kelly lied, offering the water as he set it on the stand by her side of the bed. "How are are you feeling?"

"Just," Lacey said, holding up a hand to make him stop. "Shhhh..." Kelly laughed a little, getting back into bed with her and putting his arm around her. "I'm not moving," she said slowly. "Not for another, like, eight hours or something."

"Mmm," Kelly nodded in agreement, kissing her head. "I'm guessing now would be a bad time to remind you we were gonna take the boys to the zoo this afternoon."

"Ugh," Lacey groaned, pulling the blankets over her head. She loved her nephews, but she felt miserable right now.

Putting it off as long as possible, she eventually got out of bed to shower, the nausea subsiding but the pounding headache sticking around. After getting dressed, she and Kelly went over to the Darden house to pick up the boys. While Heather was perfectly aware that Kelly was going with them, he still waited out by the car while Lacey went inside to get the boys, knowing Heather wouldn't be crazy about seeing him. He rolled his shoulder back, feeling a slight twinge of pain but nothing compared to what he felt before, the pain killers doing the trick.

"Uncle Kelly!" he heard two voices cheering, running down the front steps of the Darden house.

"Hey guys!" Kelly greeted them, kneeling down to hug them both. He had missed them a lot, not seeing them much since Andy had passed away, only in passing. Heather hadn't been letting him see them, but since Lacey's accident, she knew she couldn't keep the boys from her too.

"Are you ready for the zoo?"

"Yeah!" they both nodded excitedly.

"All right, well get in," Kelly laughed, allowing the two of them to climb into the backseat. Lacey smiled at him as she came down the steps now, happy that he got to spend time with the boys today. He knew that they all missed each other a lot, really needing each other after Andy had passed away. On their way to the zoo, the boys couldn't stop talking as they updated Kelly on everything that he had missed in the last two months.

"Uncle Kelly, guess what," Sean went on, Andy's youngest son.

"What?" Kelly asked, glancing at him in the rear view mirror. Lacey smiled, knowing the constant chatter would drive other guys crazy but Kelly was loving every minute of it.

"I lost another tooth!" Sean said, smiling big and pulling his bottom lip down so Kelly could see.

"No way!" Kelly said enthusiastically.

Kelly loved Jack and Sean, he loved being their dad's best friend turned uncle. He had been looking forward to Jack and Sean since Andy and Heather first got married when they were only twenty-one. Jack came shortly after, being eight now, and Sean was six. The best part about having a friend with kids was you got to hang out with them and have fun without any of the responsibilities of having your own kids, which Kelly certainly wasn't ready for anytime soon. But, because they were Andy's kids and Lacey's nephews, he loved them unconditionally.

"Uncle Kelly," Jack said, his tone somewhat serious.

"Yeah?" Kelly asked, looking at him now in the mirror. He could tell by the third grader's look that he had something he wanted to ask. "What is it buddy?"

"Are you like our real uncle now?" he asked, knowing that uncles were either your parent's brother or married to your parent's sister. Kelly hadn't ever been either, just their dad's best friend who was always around when they needed him. "Since you and Aunt Lacey live together."

"We don't live together honey," Lacey said in confusion, turning in her seat to look at the boys.

"That's not what mom said," Jack told her and Sean nodded in agreement.

"Mommy said you lived at Kelly's, that's why we don't visit," Sean explained.

"Uh huh," Lacey said, shooting Kelly a glance as she turned back in her seat.

"So guys," Kelly changed the subject, reaching a hand over to hold Lacey's. "What are you excited to see? I think the tigers are going to be cool."

"Lions!"

"Rhinos!"

"Those are good too," Kelly laughed squeezing Lacey's hand and getting her to smile too. "Relax," he told her quietly. "Let's just have fun today, ok?"

"K," she smiled back, squeezing his hand in return.

It was nice, just getting to spend the afternoon with her three favorite boys. She walked with Jack, holding his hand while Kelly had hoisted Sean up onto his shoulders to carry him. Lacey worried about his shoulder, but thanks to an unknown pill that he had slipped in the pocket of his jacket, his shoulder was fine for him to carry Sean around the zoo.

The boys went on and on still at the zoo, telling Kelly and Lacey about the costumes they had picked out for Halloween later that week. Sean was going to go as a superhero while Jack was going to go as a football player. They begged the two of them to take them trick or treating, but Lacey knew that Heather would want to take them. Instead, Lacey promised to meet them at her parents' house, where the boys always went last on trick or treating to take the rest of their grandparents' candy, dump their bags on the table, and swap pieces of candy for their favorites. Maybe she just wouldn't tell Heather that Kelly would be there as well.

After stopping for pizza on the way home, Kelly and Lacey dropped the boys off at Heather's again, the mom waving at them from the window as the boys ran up the steps, not even coming out to say hi. Lacey shook her head at her sister in law, though she didn't bring anything up because she didn't' want to spoil the perfect day.

"How are _you_ feeling?" Kelly asked now, since Lacey had been fussing over his shoulder all afternoon while he was carrying Sean.

"Fine," Lacey nodded, but she rested her hand on her side, feeling the stitches through her shirt's soft material. The thought of the large scar on her abdomen made her self conscious, but she knew that she was lucky to be alive after her accident.

"Sure you don't want anything for it?" Kelly asked as they parked in front of his building.

"Nah," Lacey shook her head as they got out of the car. She smiled as he came over to her side to kiss her, his arms wrapping around her.

"You could always drink with Shay again," he laughed and she grimaced.

"I think I just threw up a little in my mouth," she said, practically tasting the alcohol all over at the thought and it made her sick. "Ugh," she groaned as they went inside. "When can I get this stupid cast off though?"

"Thanksgiving," Kelly answered, opening the door for her.

"Well, guess that answers what I'm going as for Halloween," she laughed as they went up to his apartment, holding up her arm that had the cast. "Car accident victim." She fluttered her eye lashes at him in an exaggerated way. "Sexy, right?"

"Extremely," Kelly laughed, kissing her now outside the apartment door. Pulling back, he rested his forehead against hers. "You know what the boys were talking about before?" He was nervous as he prepared to ask her this, knowing it was a little fast but he had been thinking about it all day.

"Ah, who could eat the most candy corn before puking?" she giggled, looking him over curiously. "Because, I think I could take you in a candy corn contest, since-"

"Move in with me and Shay," Kelly cut her off and Lacey's mouth nearly dropped open in surprise.

"You're high or something," Lacey joked, turning to open the door, though she had no idea the daze he had been fighting all day due to the pain meds.

"I'm serious," Kelly stopped her. "Look, you spend every night here anyway. Shay loves you." He took her face in his hands. "I love you." Lacey smiled a little, but bit her lip nervously.

"Kelly, it's so fast though," Lacey went on. "We've haven't even been together six months! And most of those were sneaking around..."

"Lace, I've literally known you forever," Kelly laughed. "Ok? I don't remember not knowing you." Lacey continued to hesitate, looking down at her feet; he knew he had kind of sprung this on her out of no where. "Think about it?"

"Ok," she nodded, giving him a small smile.

"All right," Kelly grinned again, giving her a quick kiss. "A solid maybe." Lacey laughed, following him into the apartment.

* * *

That weekend was Halloween and Kelly didn't know why he was so nervous about going over to Lacey's parents' home with her. After all, he had basically grown up at that house, spending a lot of weekends and holidays there when his dad wasn't around. He certainly liked Mark and Sarah, that wasn't the issue really. But, he had only seen them a handful of times since Andy had passed away. And he had only seen them once since he had publicly started dating Lacey, which was at the hospital after her accident. So, really, he had never spent time with them as the parents of his girlfriend instead of the parents of his best friend. And _that_ made him nervous.

It wasn't as bad as he thought though. Lacey was with her mom most of the time, passing out candy to trick or treaters, leaving him with her dad who seemed happy to have him there, the two of them watching the game together. They only talked about Lacey once, mostly because her dad wanted to get it out there. He told Kelly that he was happy to have someone that he knew his entire life dating his daughter, that he knew they were a good fit, but he did add on not to hurt her.

Kelly was feeling pretty good that night, hanging out with his girl and fitting right in with her family. Heather didn't even seem to bothered that he was there when she brought the boys by, or maybe she was just pretending for the sake of the kids. Either way, it was better than how she treated him before. He knew that the pain killers he was taking certainly weren't hurting how he felt, continuing through a bit of a fog as the night went on.

"Hey," Lacey said, getting his attention as everyone was slowly starting to leave her parents' house. He looked at her, waiting for her to continue. "When can you get me a key?" Kelly grinned from ear to ear, kissing her.

* * *

Lacey moved in with him and Shay the next weekend, though he still wasn't letting her do much of the moving since she still had her cast on. Thankfully by now, her stitches were gone, but she was still self conscious about her scar. Lacey had gone out to grab take out for dinner leaving Kelly alone in the apartment. The pain firing up in his shoulder after moving all of Lacey's boxes, he stopped in the kitchen pulling the prescription bottle from his pocket to take another pill. He had been trying to stretch them out, making them last as long as he could. And, thankfully, the doctor had written a refill on them which he fully planned to use.

"What is that?" he heard Shay saying behind him as he popped the pill into his mouth. He turned to see her with her arms cross, swallowing the medication first before answering.

"Tylenol?" he offered and she shook her head at him, coming over and snatching the pill bottle from him.

"Lacey's percocet?" Shay asked in shock. "Kelly! I..." She trailed off, not sure what to say. "Does Lacey know?" He shook his head. "Oh Kelly," she sighed. "What is she going to think?"

"She's going to sleep better, that's for sure," Kelly jumped in now and Shay shook her head at him. "C'mon Shay! Everything is going good for us, for the first time since Andy's accident, things have been great, like they were before." He lowered his voice, his eyes pleading. "Just let me have this." Shay glared at him, her eyes serious as they heard Lacey coming through the front door.

"If she asks me about it, I won't lie," Shay whispered.

"Hey roomies!" Lacey grinned, bringing plastic bags of Chinese food over. "I got dinner."

"Smells great," Shay smiled at her, though she shot Kelly a warning look; he gave a grateful one back.

**thanks for reading! would love to hear what you thought! :)**


	7. Red Handed

**thanks for the review and follows! :) it really means a lot, hope you like this update!**

_Red Handed_

Nearly a month passed, with Kelly having stretched the bottle of pills as far as he could. He had to go back to the pharmacy to pick up the other refill, having another bottle to help him last for awhile. He wondered what he was going to do when the percocet were out, since Shay wasn't helping him anymore either and there weren't any more refills. As he headed into the station on Thanksgiving, Lacey with him, he shook the thought from him mind.

"Whoa, Severide," Hermann started to scold as they came into the common room, Lacey carrying two trays of food. "Making the lady carry everything?"

"I actually fought him for it," Lacey laughed, setting the trays on the counter, then holding up her arm. "Because guess who finally got their cast off!"

"Very nice," Casey laughed.

"What did you make?" Dawson asked.

"Probably the best dessert ever," Kelly explained, putting an arm around his girl.

"You're biased," Lacey laughed before turning to Dawson. "They're chocolate with peanut butter frosting."

"Oh God," Shay complained as she came through to take a seat with Dawson. "Please keep those away from me, I had like three of them last night."

"Are you going to come for dinner Lacey?" Dawson asked.

"I wish she would," Kelly said, squeezing her shoulders and getting a look from her.

"I have dinner at Heather's," Lacey explained.

"Ah."

"Yeah," Lacey agreed, just as the alarm started to go off over head. "Sounds like you guys have a busy day anyway," as Kelly let her go, giving her a quick kiss. "Be safe."

"Will do," he promised.

* * *

Why was the only question that came to mind as Kelly and the others headed back to the station. Why did they have to stumble upon a meth lab today? Why did they have to get a drug test today? Why had he taken those percocet this morning? The last two questions he already knew the answer to, but that didn't make it any easier. He was going to get caught, he knew it. They were going to see the drugs he was taking, prescription medication that wasn't even his for an injury he was trying to hide.

"Hey, Shay," Kelly said, stopping her and leading her to the side.

"Hm?" she asked, turning around.

"I think I need your help with something," Kelly answered, explaining the current situation of how he had taken some of the pain meds that morning to help get through their shift.

"Oh my God, Severide," Shay complained, her voice low. "Are you serious?"

"Is there anyway I could put this off?" Kelly asked hopefully and Shay gave him an oh please look. "What if I said that Lacey just gave me a couple..."

"For what?" Shay jumped in. "Those are some serious pain meds, it's not just going to be for a headache or a pinched nerve. Plus, they've been building up in your system over the last month and that's going to show." Kelly sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Plus, they'd call Lacey to confirm that."

"Ok, ok," Kelly stopped her. "I get it, it was a bad idea."

"What?" Shay asked, looking him over. "Saying Lacey gave you them, or using them in the first place?" Kelly didn't answer, he only walked off.

* * *

"So, where's Kelly again?" Heather asked curiously as Lacey was helping in the kitchen, the boys playing football in the yard with some neighbor kids, her parents not arriving yet. Lacey stood at the counter, slicing potatoes.

"Um, on shift," Lacey answered in confusion. Since when did Heather care about where Kelly was? Lacey still had to hide him when they came to pick up the boys for stuff, and the boys certainly weren't allowed to visit Lacey and Kelly at their place.

"Oh right," Heather nodded along. "I think you mentioned that."

"Yeah..."

"Lacey," Heather sighed, stopping on the other side of the counter from her. "I know..." She wasn't sure how to start. "I know you think that I'm a bitch for this whole Kelly thing." Lacey opened her mouth to protest, but then stopped. Well, Heather wasn't wrong. "I'm not...just mad at Kelly because of what happened to Andy."

"What are you talking about?" Lacey asked in confusion. What else could Kelly have done?

"I started seeing your brother when we were nineteen," Heather said with a soft smile as she remembered. "You were only fourteen, a freshman in high school." Heather laughed a little. "I got to watch you grow up, through high school and college. Now, you're an adult and..." She shook her head. "I never had any sisters of my own. And I love you Lacey, I really do-"

"I love you too Heather," Lacey promised. She hoped Heather didn't think she brought Kelly around to spite her or something. "But what does this have to do with Kelly?" Heather sighed again.

"I know you think you know," Heather tried to explain. "What it's like, because of your dad and brother." Heather looked down. "But...it's completely different when you promise to spend forever with someone, when you have kids with them. The worry, the hurt...they're all different." She looked up at Lacey again. "I just don't want Kelly to hurt you."

"He's not going to," Lacey said back.

"Maybe not on purpose," Heather assured her. "But..." She swallowed hard. "I never expected to be a widow before my 30th birthday." Lacey went to respond, but the boys came running inside and Heather wiped a few stray tears from her eyes.

"Hey guys!" she greeted them as they came running in, peeling off their jackets and hats. "Go wash up, Grandma and Grandpa will be here soon."

* * *

Kelly avoided the drug test for as long as he could. Finally, being the last one who hadn't taken it yet, he went back to the bathroom with the white plastic cup, staring at it on the counter. Everything was about to come out, the pills, the secrets. What would it do to his career? And, worse, what was this going to do to his relationship? If Lacey knew he had been taking her pills for the last month...

"Kelly," a quiet voice came from behind him. Kelly looked to see Shay had come into the bathroom, offering him another white plastic cup.

"Shay..."

"Don't," she shook her head before walking off, clearly fed up with him at this point.

Kelly knew that he was pushing it, that this secret was more dangerous than he realized. But, what was he supposed to do? Get the surgery, be out of work for a year, or maybe even forever? Giving up being a firefighter was not an option, but neither was losing Lacey. Maybe he would talk to another doctor, get a second opinion. The thoughts raced through his mind and into the next morning as he left the station for home. When he got there, he was surprised to see Lacey was home since she spent the night at Heather's the night before.

"Hey," she grinned at him, having just finished breakfast herself. "There's still some pancakes on the stove, if you want some. Chocolate chip."

"Best roommate ever," he smiled at her, coming over to give her a quick kiss. While he and Shay could cook, everything Lacey made just seemed to be ten times better.

"How was your shift?" Lacey asked.

"Eh," Kelly shrugged, careful not to rub or roll his currently aching shoulder in front of her. "The usual. Dinner was nice though. How was Heather's?"

"Um, weird," Lacey laughed a little, getting up from the counter now.

"Weird how?" Kelly asked.

"Just Heather stuff," Lacey brushed it off, kissing him again. "I'm gonna head to the laundromat, do you need anything washed?"

"Nah, I don't think so," he shook his head as he watched her head for the stairs. "But, thanks."

"Yep," Lacey nodded, going upstairs. Kelly could hear her shuffling around up in their room as he dug into his breakfast. When he heard her coming back down the stairs, no laundry basket but with her bag over her shoulder, he laughed a little.

"Abandoning laundry already?" he asked, knowing how much she hated the chore. She went over to the counter without a word, setting the bottle of percocet in front of him. "Lace-"

"My pain killers?" she asked him with raised eye brows; Kelly tried to explain but she immediately cut him off. "Not just my pain killers, but the refill of my pain killers." She ran a hand through her hair. "Have you been taking these, since my accident?"

"Lace-"

"God, don't answer that," Lacey stopped him, turning to leave the apartment.

"Lacey, stop," Kelly said, going after her and grabbing her arm.

"_Don't_ touch me," Lacey snapped as she turned around, pushing him off of her. There were tears in her eyes. "You've been lying to me Kelly, for weeks." She shook her head. "Did you think I was stupid, that I wouldn't figure it out?"

"No!" Kelly protested. "That's not it at all." He shook his head now. "It's just managing the pain in my shoulder, I-"

"God, don't throw that at me!" Lacey argued. "_Pain management_, Kelly, is taking an ibuprofen every so often. Not running through a bottle of percocet like it's candy!"

"Lacey, I can't..." Kelly tried to tell her. "I can't not be a firefighter."

"Well, think about what you lost instead," Lacey said, turning to go. She slammed the door before he could even go after her.

* * *

Matt had gone out for a drive, needing to clear his head. He had just gotten into an argument with Hallie and part of him hoped she wasn't around when he came back. It was a lot to take, knowing the person you wanted to spend your life with didn't want the same things as you. Maybe they just weren't meant to work out. Turning on the street by Heather's place, he stopped when he saw the brunette crying on the front stoop.

"Lacey?" Matt said in confusion, getting out of his truck and going over to her. "What are you doing?" He looked her over. "Is everything ok?"

"I think, um," Lacey sniffed, wiping at her eyes. "I think I just broke up with Kelly? I don't know...I just..."

"What happened?" Matt asked in shock. He had always though that Kelly and Lacey were doing ok, but from his own experience, things could always look ok on the outside. "What did he do?" For Lacey to be this upset, he knew she wasn't the one at fault.

"I can't get into this right now," Lacey shook her head, getting up from the stoop now. "I just..." She teared up again. "I tried my parents', but they're visiting my aunt in Madison. And I forgot Heather was taking the boys to her parents' for the weekend." She shook her head. "And I left my keys for both places at the apartment, so typical..."

"Do you need a place to crash?" Matt offered.

"Oh no," Lacey shook her head quickly. "I couldn't ask you to-"

"Seriously, it's ok," Matt promised. "Just till Heather or your parents' get back, all right?" He studied her reaction. "Or, if you make up with Kelly first."

"Doubtful," Lacey sighed, wiping the last of the tears off her face. "Thanks Matt."

"Sure thing," he nodded, giving her a reassuring smile. "And, listen, if he really did hurt you I'll kick his ass." He knew that Andy probably would have killed Kelly by now, not even having to know what happened, his baby sister's tears being enough. Lacey bit her lip as she laughed.

"Thanks," she told him before she followed him home.

**thanks for reading! hope you liked it. reviews please! :)**


	8. Needing You

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_Needing You_

Kelly didn't know what to do once Lacey had gone. Should he go after her? No, she needed time away, to cool off before something came out that neither of them meant. Should he try to call her? No, she wouldn't answer, or if she did she would just hang up. He knew her well enough. But, what did that leave him with? Sitting and waiting. It drove him crazy, just sitting at the apartment, his thoughts consuming him. Had they broken up or was it just a fight? When she came back, would it be to make up or pick up her things? Things had been going so well for them...he contemplated all of these things as he sat on the couch, staring at the prescription bottle in his hands.

"Hey," Shay nodded at her roommate, not noticing how bothered he was as she came in and dropped her bag. "Oh man, something smells awesome." She headed over into the kitchen where she saw the leftovers Lacey had left from breakfast.

"Seriously Kel," Shay said as she took a seat next to him. "Having Lacey move in was, like, one of the best ideas you've ever had." She grinned at him. "Where's she at?" Then, her face fell at the sight of the pills.

"Oh..." She knew she had put her foot in her mouth, bad. "Kelly, I..."

"What do I do Shay?" he stopped her. "I need..." He swallowed. "I need help."

* * *

"I know it's not really my business," Casey said as he took a seat next to Lacey on the couch, her phone buzzing away on the coffee table with a call from Kelly. She had been dodging calls from him the whole afternoon. Casey was being nice to her because he felt bad about whatever happened, but he was giving her space. Now though, as Kelly kept trying to call her, he started to wonder about his friend as well and what really happened.

"But, do you want to tell me what happened?" Casey asked as the phone finally ceased. Lacey sighed, running a hand through her hair. "He...seems sorry?"

"I just...can't talk to him right now," Lacey shook her head.

"Why not?" Casey asked.

"I don't think he would want me to get into it," Lacey told Matt. "It's just...he's been hurting a lot, since Andy." There was no reason for her to explain what kind of pain. "And, he lies to me about it." She shook her head again. "Deals with it in a bad way. And..." She bit her lip. "I can't watch him tear himself apart."

"It's not really my place," Casey told her again. "But I think that now might be the worst time to be away from him." He shrugged. "Kelly doesn't need many people Lacey, but he _needs_ you." He observed her expression. "Sleep on it?"

"I don't have to," Lacey shook her head, getting up. She knew that he was right. Kelly had been there for her since Andy died and her accident, taking care of every need that she had. Now, she needed to be there for him, to help him when he needed her the most. He was in pain, it was taking away everything that meant from him, and she just ran out? Now she felt guilty.

* * *

Shay had gone, helping Clarice get the remainder of her things while Daniel was out. She had shown up while Lacey was gone, needing a place to stay. Kelly sat at the apartment alone, having just gone out to look for Lacey, turning up empty at her parents' and Heather's house. He returned to the apartment, starting to look into a group for support with his problem with the pain killers. And, on his next shift, he was going to talk to Boden and make an appointment to see a doctor about getting surgery. All he wanted to do now was lay the plan out for Lacey, who was no where to be found. Sitting on the couch, numb as he mostly ignored what was in front of him on the tv, he turned his head when he heard the door, expecting Shay.

"Lace!" he said in surprise, hopping up when he saw her. "You're back..." He was happy that he was back, but he trailed off when he remembered that Clarice was only going back to pick up her stuff. "Did, um," he asked hesitantly. "Did you want to talk or-"

"I'm so sorry Kelly," she cut him off and he looked at her in more surprise.

"What?" Kelly asked curiously. "Baby, no, you don't have to be sorry about anything. I'm the one who-"

"I know," Lacey stopped him, not needing him to repeat it. "I know...but..." She sighed, her eyes welling up a bit but she kept the tears back. "I never should have left. Because..." She started to trail off.

"Hey," Kelly said gently, taking her face in his hands. "Hey, it's all right." He gave her a soft smile. "I'm the stupid ass, remember?" She bit her lip.

"I know you need to be a firefighter," she continued. "I know what that means, I know how important it is. So, I'm going to help you." She fought a small smile. "Even if it means that I have to kick your ass the whole way through detox."

"Fair enough," Kelly laughed a little, kissing her lightly.

* * *

It had been a few days, all four roommates adjusting to living together. Lacey was at work now, continuing to check her phone. She was waiting to hear from Kelly, since it was his first day back on shift since their fight. He was supposed to talk to Boden today and set up an appointment with a new doctor. While he promised not to lie to her and to get help, this all still made her very nervous as there was a real possibility he would no longer be a firefighter. That possibility became even more realistic when he showed up at her classroom at ten in the morning.

"Uncle Kelly!" Jack called from his seat, causing Lacey to look over.

"Hey buddy," Kelly gave a small wave as he walked over to Lacey's desk.

"Keep working guys," Lacey encouraged as Kelly had caused a small buzz in her classroom while they were working on Christmas tree ornaments. She looked Kelly over once, back in his street clothes of jeans, shirt and his jacket. "What's going on?"

"Ah," Kelly hesitated, scratching the back of his head. "Boden, um, sent me home till I talk to the doctor." He shook his head. "I don't want to bug you at work..."

"No, no, it's fine," Lacey brushed it off. "They're eight, they hardly care." Kelly smiled a little, but still felt pretty crappy.

"My appointment is later today, at two," he explained. "I know you're not done till three, so we'll talk after at home?"

"You know, it's weird," she commented. "I'm feeling the stomach flu coming on." She shrugged with a smile. "Might have to call in a sub for the afternoon." Kelly smiled again, which was the best part about Lacey. His worst day and he was smiling. "I'll meet you there."

"Thank you," he squeezed her hand before letting her go.

* * *

When Lacey arrived at the office, Kelly was already in with the doctor. They were looking at x-rays, not really noticing that she was there. She knocked on the door gently, before walking over to the table where Kelly was sitting and immediately taking his hand. She could see in his face that something was wrong, that he wasn't getting quite the news that he wanted.

"Sorry to interrupt," Lacey said as they stopped to look at her.

"It's perfectly fine," the doctor assured her as she prepared to continue. "You're Lacey?" She nodded. "I'm afraid, the break is larger than the other doctor indicated."

"What does that mean?" Lacey asked, looking between the doctor and Kelly.

"Surgery," he mumbled.

"Ok," Lacey nodded slowly, trying to keep a positive out look. "But, I was reading on this kind of surgery. It would be six months for recovery, right?" The doctor shook her head.

"With this type of injury, with how far it's extended, it would be closer to a year," the doctor explained.

"So, in a year, you're back at work," Lacey said lightly to Kelly, before looking at the doctor. "Right?" The doctor bit her lip.

"I haven't seen anyone go back to duty after this kind of surgery," the doctor explained and Kelly let out a long sigh, while Lacey found herself holding her breath. "I'm sure you've talked to your chief-"

"Yeah," Kelly nodded. "Said, um, he could get me arson investigation or, ah, teaching at the academy."

"I can give you two a moment," the doctor said, leaving Kelly and Lacey alone.

"You're not everybody else," Lacey immediately told Kelly. "You'd probably do the six month thing, even if they say a year." Kelly gave her a half smile.

"Maybe," he nodded. "Or, maybe I'll teach." He winked at her playfully. "You do it, how hard is it?" She rolled her eyes at him, fighting a smile on her face. This wasn't like Kelly to just give up on something.

"I want you to look at this," Lacey said, pulling out her phone, having done research on her own. "I found this doctor, here in Chicago who..."

"When did you do this?" Kelly asked appreciatively, knowing she was doing all this for him.

"When I was at Casey's the other day," Lacey shrugged, trying to find the page in her phone's history. Kelly looked at her in confusion.

"When were you with Casey?" he asked curiously.

"After the fight," Lacey answered, knowing that was the wrong answer when she saw Kelly's face. "Ok, _no_, my parents weren't around and neither was Heather. I needed a place to crash."

"You were going to stay over with him?"

"I didn't stay," Lacey argued back. "And it wasn't with him with him." She shook her head. "Holy hell," she muttered in annoyance.

"I'm sorry," Kelly told her. "Just..." He motioned at his shoulder. "This." She nodded, showing him the doctor on her phone.

"He's doing this new surgery," she started to explain. "And the recovery time is a month." She was grinning at him. "You'd be back on squad in no time."

"Why didn't she tell me about this?" he asked, pointing at the door where the doctor had left.

"There's a lot of risks," she told him hesitantly. "Since this is so...new."

"What kind of risks?" Kelly asked curiously.

"Ah," Lacey bit her lip. "Partial paralysis?"

"Lacey," Kelly complained. "No, there's no way. I can't..." He trailed off when he saw her face, disappointed and a little hurt. "It's not that I don't appreciate what you did," he told her. "But, there's no way I could go through with something like that."

"But you'd be able to fight fires again," Lacey argued.

"Or end up half paralyzed," Kelly said back. "I could be back on squad next year."

"Or teaching," Lacey reminded him.

"I'm sorry Lace," Kelly shook his head. "I...can't."

* * *

Lacey knew that this wasn't like Kelly at all, to not fight for something that he wanted. That afternoon, he had gone to talk to his doctor again, preparing for his surgery the following week. While he was out, she knew that if he wasn't going to listen to her there was at least one person that could talk to him. She understood the risk of the surgery, but she also understood what it was like to not be a firefighter anymore, having seen it with her dad. When Kelly arrived home for dinner, he immediately smiled at the smell.

"Something smells great," Kelly grinned as he came into the kitchen to find Lacey cooking at the stove. He was surprised who was sitting at the counter though, having coffee. "Dad?"

"Quite the girl you have here," Benny motioned to Lacey, who looked at Kelly a bit nervously.

"You...called my dad?" Kelly asked in confusion, knowing what this is about.

"She was right to," Benny interjected. "Kelly, you gotta go with this surgery."

"And if I end up paralyzed?" Kelly asked him with raised eye brows.

"How do you think you'll feel if you start teaching?" Benny asked back, then held up a hand as he looked at Lacey. "No offense sweetheart." She waved him off. "You think I like telling all my old stories, from when I was on squad?"

"As much as I've heard them," Kelly mused and Benny shook his head.

"There's nothing you shouldn't do," he told his son. "Nothing you shouldn't risk to keep doing what you love." He studied his son for a reaction. "Take it from me, it's better to be on squad then just talk about it." Kelly didn't say anything. "I wasn't going to stay," he said, getting up from the counter. "Thank you, for the coffee Lacey."

"Sure Mr. S," she nodded at him.

"Benny," he corrected her with a smile before he left, leaving Kelly and Lacey in silence until Shay and Clarice came home from shopping. They were getting some things for the apartment since Clarice was expecting a baby any day now. As they came back, they knew what Lacey's plan was as they got Benny there but they could tell by the air in the room that Kelly and Lacey weren't talking about it.

"Oh you made dinner," Clarice said to Lacey, noticing that Lacey made spaghetti and Clarice had said before they left that she was craving Italian food. "That's so sweet!"

"Yeah, of course," Lacey nodded, getting out plates. "And, I remembered you said something crunchy? So those noodles in that pot aren't cooked the whole way."

"Ugh, you're awesome," Clarice said as they all sat down to dinner.

"Thank God I'm not pregnant," Shay commented. "I could never handle all those cravings." Everyone was quiet as Kelly came to sit down, waiting for something to be said but he didn't say anything at first, digging into his dinner. He sipped his water, looking at his girlfriend next to him and his roommate and her girlfriend across the table.

"If I get the surgery, will the three of you stop staring at me like that?" Kelly asked the women.

"Are you serious?" Lacey asked, turning to him and he nodded. "Kelly, I know it's scary, but I will be here through _everything_."

"Me too," Shay added. "I am so proud of you."

"Same," Lacey agreed and she saw the slight smile playing on Kelly's lips.

"Thank you," he told them. "For giving this to me." He took Lacey's hand. "For sticking with me."

**thanks for reading! hope you liked it, more soon! :) please review!**


	9. Not Always Easy

**thanks for the reviews, favorites, and follows! :) sorry for the wait, writer's block! :( it means so much to me that you like the story! hope you like this update!**

_Not Always Easy_

Lacey sat in the waiting room, anxious. She was sitting with Shay, waiting for someone to come out to talk to them about Kelly's surgery. The surgery was going to take eight hours. And, while that was long enough in itself, it felt like she had been in the hospital for three days. Now she knew what he must have felt like when she had to get surgery after her accident. It was agonizing. Finally, the nurse came back to talk to the two of them.

"How is he?" Lacey asked quickly as she and Shay got up from their seats.

"The surgery went well," the nurse assured them. "They're taking him into recovery now, I'll let you know when you can see him in his room."

"How long is he going to have to stay?" Shay asked her.

"Four days," she answered. "Mostly precautionary, to make sure he doesn't react to the anesthesia. And we'll be keeping an eye out for infection." She gave them a comforting smile. "I'll have his doctor talk more with you in a bit, but we will start him on something for pain management." Lacey bit her lip, glancing over at Shay but the nurse didn't notice the exchange, leaving the waiting room.

"What are we going to do for him?" Lacey asked Shay once they were alone.

"Take him home and care for him as best we can," Shay answered. "Take him to all his physical therapy-"

"You know what I'm talking about," Lacey said, keeping her voice low. "Trust me, I'm going to do everything I can to help him come back from this. But, we're not just dealing with someone who's had spinal surgery."

"We're dealing with someone in detox," Shay finished sadly, letting out a sigh. "I know."

"And that's sleepless nights," Lacey said, sinking back onto her chair. "Vomiting." She sighed as she ran a hand through her hair. "Pain on top of what he's already dealing with." She looked over at Shay who sat with her now. "I'm worried about him."

"Me too," Shay agreed. "But, we just gotta be there for him. One day at a time."

"One day at a time," Lacey nodded quietly in agreement.

* * *

Kelly was starting to wake up now, feeling some pain in his upper back where the incision must be. The rest of his body just felt worn out, weak. He was sure the medication they gave him was to blame, though it was just making him drowsy as opposed to helping with the pain he was feeling. He figured he must have built up a tolerance to pain medication, having maxed out the percocet he had been taking in the last few weeks.

"Hey," he heard a gentle voice saying. He looked over and saw Lacey had pulled a chair up close to his bed, her hand resting on his. "How are you feeling?"

"Mmm," Kelly grunted, closing his eyes. The more awake and aware he was, the more the pain intensified. Lacey bit her lip, not sure what to say next.

"Shay was here," Lacey told him, running her hand on his arm. "But, she had to take Clarice to the doctor."

"Mmm, k," Kelly told her.

"We'll get to take you home in a few days," Lacey said lightly. "I talked to Shay and Clarice, we were-"

"That sounds great Lace," Kelly stopped her. He wasn't worried about getting home or going to physical therapy next week. He was worried about the pain radiating from his back and into his shoulders.

"Do you need anything?" Lacey asked him and he opened his eyes to look at her again.

"Still got that bottle of percocet?" Kelly asked lightly, though he had flushed it himself the night they had their fight. "Cause these meds they got me on now aren't doing shit."

"Morphine," Lacey informed him. She had hoped that, having him on a normal dose of pain medication at the hospital might help to ween him off and make the withdrawal less severe. It didn't look like that was the case though as he was heavily agitated, a mix of the pain and the slow detox.

"I don't care what it is," Kelly grumbled. He could tell he'd upset her with how he was being. "I'm sorry Lace."

"It's ok," Lacey brushed it off. She couldn't even begin to understand the level of pain and discomfort he was in right now. "Did you...want me to call your dad or-"

"No," Kelly shook his head. "I'd just rather sleep right now." He glanced her over. "You don't have to stay."

"Of course I do," Lacey insisted. "You don't have to be by yourself."

"I don't want you seeing me like this," Kelly snapped at her. "Looking like shit, laying out in a hospital bed." It was the pain, the detox making him angry at her; he'd never normally talk to her like that.

"I'll, um, be downstairs," Lacey told him, getting up and heading for the cafeteria, not wanting to leave the hospital and having not eaten all day.

"Lace," Kelly complained, but she shut the door to the hospital room. Maybe it was better not to talk right now.

* * *

Since Lacey wasn't working right now with it being the holidays, she spent the next few days at the hospital with Kelly. He was still pretty edgy, but he tried to keep a handle on it, finding it better to keep most of his thoughts to himself rather than snap at his girlfriend continually. She called Benny and he came to the hospital once, though Kelly almost had it out with him in the hospital.

He didn't want to see anyone or talk to them. Didn't they understand? He felt like hell and couldn't take any medication for it. On top of that were the aches and pains that came with withdrawal, constantly feeling nauseous and agitated. He didn't want all these people telling him how amazing it was, how great he was doing, how lucky he was. He certainly didn't feel lucky; he felt like he'd been hit by a train. He just had to sit and watch Shay go off on shift, down to work where he longed to be doing the job that he loved.

Kelly followed Lacey into the empty apartment that afternoon, his first day home. Clarice was with her parents getting the rest of what she needed for the baby to arrive while Shay was on shift. They had barely spoken since she had picked him up, making polite small talk as she drove him in his car on the way home. He didn't care that Lacey was driving, but he did care that he wasn't allowed to drive. Not up for going upstairs right now, Kelly sank onto the couch while Lacey dropped his duffel bag by the staircase.

"Are you hungry?" Lacey asked lightly, going over to the the refrigerator and opening it to scope out any leftovers from that week.

"Kinda," Kelly shrugged. "Hey...Lace?"

"Hm?" she asked, turning around to see him.

"I'm really sorry," he apologized to her.

"You don't have to be sorry," Lacey told him as she went to sit next to him. She sat sideways with her legs under her, rubbing the back of his head gently.

"Yeah, I do," Kelly said back. "I know I haven't been..." He didn't know how to say it. "Easy to be around lately. I've been kind of a dick to you."

"You just had surgery," Lacey reasoned. "You can be a dick to whoever you want to." She smiled a little, making him smile back as well.

"Not to you," Kelly said. "You've been so great through this."

"Don't get too crazy," Lacey grinned at him. "Because I wasn't kidding about kicking your ass through physical therapy." She kissed his cheek. "I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

Lacey was taking Kelly to physical therapy every day since she was still on break from school. With each session, she could see an amazing improvement in Kelly's strength. She was sure that he was going to be back to himself in no time, back to work and everything. While the physical therapy was helping him get through the surgery, there still wasn't much she could do for the withdrawal. She had read that it could take at least a month before the withdrawal wasn't as bad, months before it went away. Coming home that afternoon from her parents, she found Kelly vomiting in their bathroom. She left but returned quickly with a bottle of gatorade.

"Thanks," Kelly grumbled as he got up, flushing the toilet and then rinsing his mouth at the sink.

"How are you feeling?" Lacey asked gently as she handed him the bottle. He gave her an obvious look as he sipped the sports drink. "Right, sorry." She bit her lip. "I have some news."

"Mmm, what kind?" Kelly asked as he went back into their room, collapsing on their bed as the pain was flaring up a bit.

"The good kind," she assured him, laying out on her back next to him, both of them looking up. "You know how Thanksgiving is always at my parents, then Christmas was always with Andy and Heather?"

"Uh huh," Kelly nodded. He remembered since he was always part of the Darden holidays, his dad always away and his mother gone. He wasn't sure how this was supposed to make him feel better though. Heather was still a problem with him and it was either going to be Lacey went to her family's alone for Christmas, or she didn't see them because she spent the day with him.

"Well, Heather wanted you to come next week," Lacey said, looking over at him. He turned his head over to her in confusion.

"You're serious?" Kelly asked with raised eye brows; she nodded.

"If you want," Lacey told him. "I figured we'd go over to Heather's, see the boys."

"Yeah, that's great Lace," Kelly agreed.

* * *

Today, like most days, was still hard but Kelly fought through it. Shay and Clarice were already gone, spending the morning with her parents and the rest of her family since Shay's family lived out of town. Kelly and Lacey got up early, heading over to Heather's. Even though he felt pretty miserable, nauseous mostly since the pain had started to go away in his shoulders and neck, he was still ecstatic to see the boys; the feeling was mutual.

"Uncle Kelly!" the boys cheered as they came over to hug him. Lacey's parents were already there, the boys having started opening presents with them and their mother.

"Hey!" Kelly laughed, hugging them both.

"Kelly, come here, look," they were telling him.

"Ahem," Lacey laughed as she followed the three of them into the living room, her parents sitting on the couch and Heather on the floor by the tree. "I'm hurt guys!"

"Hi Aunt Lacey!" Jack said first, hugging her.

"Hi!" Sean said second, hugging her now.

"That's better," she laughed, kissing his head before releasing him. As she was hugging her nephews, Kelly was greeted by her parents, hugging her mom first, then shaking hands with her dad.

"Hey Mr. Darden," Kelly greeted him.

"Kelly," he smiled at him. "How's your shoulder?"

"Better," Kelly nodded, this being the first time in a long time that it was true. "I have my eval next week, to see if I can start going on shift again."

"I bet you're back in no time," Heather chimed in, Sean climbing in her lap on the floor to open his next present.

"Thanks Heather," Kelly told her.

This was one of the better days Kelly had in a long time. He wasn't fighting off any pain, he wasn't hiding any secrets, abusing medications, lying to his girlfriend. He was just there, being happy with her and her family on Christmas. He got to spend the day with Andy's kids and feel like he was wanted there by Heather. They were getting along great, their family comfortable in every way. This was what he had always wanted. He got to be with the girl he loved and be completely at ease.

"Hey," Kelly pulled her off to the side and into the kitchen so they could be alone. The kids were burned out, curled up on the couches with their grandparents and mom under a million blankets as they watched Christmas specials.

"Hm?" Lacey laughed as he hugged her close, planting a kiss on her head as she looked up at him.

"I wanna give you your present," he told her.

"We already did presents," she said in confusion as he reached into his pocket.

"I got you something else," Kelly said, handing her the little box.

"Kelly," Lacey complained as she opened it, not having gotten him anything else. Inside there was a necklace with a delicate angel charm on it. "Kelly!" she said as she look at him now. "It's..." She didn't know what to say. "Really pretty, thank you."

"For my guardian angel," he told her with a smile.

"Kel," she said, trying to make it sound like she was complaining again, but really she was touched.

"I don't know what I'd do without you," Kelly said to her. "I love you."

"I love you too," she smiled, standing up on her toes to kiss him. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas," Kelly smiled at her.

**thanks for reading! :) again, sorry for the wait! hope you liked it, more soon! :)**


	10. Hey Baby

**thanks so much for the reviews, favorite, and follow! :) and thanks to those who followed me! it means so much to me. hope you like this update :) **

_Hey Baby_

Kelly had been back to work for a few weeks now, his neck completely healed. He was ecstatic to be back and Lacey was happy for him. There were still hard days, with Kelly still fighting his addiction, but slowly things were starting to get back to normal. That afternoon, Shay and Kelly had been on shift since the morning. Clarice was working from home now, the baby due any day. Lacey had been at work, but came home now after she wasn't feeling well during the day.

"Hey," Clarice greeted her when she came in. Lacey smiled politely, feeling a bit awkward. She liked Clarice all right, but she never spent any time with her without Shay or Kelly around. "You're home early."

"Nurse sent me home," Lacey laughed a little, going over to grab a glass of water. "I thought I was past that point in my life." Clarice laughed too. As she was laughing, she started wincing a little though, holding her stomach. "Is...everything ok?"

"I think it's something I ate," Clarice brushed it off, going back to her work. "I've been getting these cramps." Lacey just looked at her, remembering similar situations with Heather.

"Uh, Clarice?" Lacey said, getting her to look up from the table where she was busily writing out something. "When's your due date again?" Clarice's jaw dropped.

"Oh my God," she gasped.

* * *

Lacey drove Clarice to the hospital, getting her settled in before calling Shay at the firehouse. She was out on a call, but they said that they would tell her as soon as she got back. In the meantime, Lacey was sitting in the hospital room with Clarice, unsure of what to do. Sure, she had been at the hospital with Heather before, waiting on Andy to get there from his shift when Sean was born. But, that was different, she was close with Heather. Her and Clarice lived together, but they couldn't be more different, on different planets in terms of closeness.

"Shay's on a call," Lacey told her as she sat back down in the seat next to Clarice's bed. "They're going to tell her as soon as she gets back." Clarice nodded, breathing hard through another contraction.

"Could you," Clarice said, taking a deep breath. "Call..." The contraction was finally over, and she let her breath out slowly. "Daniel, please?" Lacey felt even more uncomfortable.

"Um," Lacey said with uncertainty. She was going to do what she had to for Clarice to be comfortable, she would do that out of her adoration for Shay. But, calling her ex husband to tell him she was currently in labor?

"I'm sorry," Clarice apologized. "That wasn't fair for me to ask you."

"You could have the doctor call," Lacey suggested. "Once the baby's born."

"Mhmm," Clarice nodded, wincing as another contraction came; Lacey bit her lip as she watched her agonize in labor pains, uncomfortable in more than one way. As of now, Lacey was three days late and had just spent the afternoon getting sick in the faculty bathroom.

"Hey!" Shay said as she came into the room, rushing over to hug and kiss Clarice, taking her hand right away. "How are you?"

"I'm ok," Clarice told her, breathing through the next contraction.

"Thanks so much Lacey," Shay told her, letting Clarice squeeze her hand. She looked the young brunette over, seeing the expression on her face; she looked like she was about to throw up. "Are you ok? You look like hell."

"I got sent home early from school," Lacey explained.

"Go home," Shay insisted. "I'll call you with anything here."

"Ok," Lacey said, somewhat grateful she didn't have to stay. The maternity ward wasn't exactly the place she wanted to be during her pregnancy scare.

Unfortunately as she left the hospital, that was all she saw. She saw pregnant women coming in and out of the hospital, either going into labor or just getting check ups by their doctor. As she left the maternity wing of the hospital, she could hear a woman screaming as she was having her baby. It made Lacey's stomach drop. She was only twenty five, she hadn't given much thought to having kids right now. That left out what Kelly might think about having a baby.

Going into the pharmacy on her way home, anything and everything to do with pregnancy was all she could see. There was what she felt to be an obnoxiously huge display advertising prenatal vitamins. There was a woman at the pharmacy counter asking what kind of cold medicine she could take while she was pregnant. She stood in the family planning aisle, the pregnancy tests practically staring at her. She almost thought it was cruel that the tampons were on the next shelf. Way to kick someone in a scare while they're down.

"Lacey?" she heard a voice saying behind her. She looked over and saw Hermann walking towards her, prescription bag in hand.

"Hi!" Lacey said, a bit quickly and over eagerly due to her nervousness. How could the first person to know about her scare be one of Kelly's co-workers and several of her students' father? "What, ah, what are you doing here? I thought you were on shift." Hermann eyed her suspiciously, her odd behavior noticeable to anyone within two aisles of them.

"I traded shifts," Hermann answered. "Cindy had a doctor's appointment today, so I went with her." He held up the bag. "Had to get her prescription now."

"Aw, that's nice," Lacey said. "She's not sick, is she?"

"She's pregnant again," Hermann answered, not sure if she heard the news yet.

"Of course she is," Lacey mumbled under her breath. How was everyone pregnant right now? And, if the women weren't pregnant, they were up to their elbows in small, screaming children.

"What?" Hermann asked curiously, not hearing her.

"Isn't that five now?" Lacey brushed it off and Hermann nodded. "Wow." She shifted nervously. "What's that like?" Right now in line at the pharmacy counter was some poor woman with twins in their toddler years. Lacey felt like she was going to throw up all over again.

"Ah, hectic," Hermann laughed. "So, what are you doing here?" Lacey forgot they were standing in the middle of family planning.

"Oh, ah," Lacey said, feeling herself turning red. She snatched the nearest box of tampons. "Ya know, girl stuff."

"Ah," Hermann nodded awkwardly.

"So, I should go," Lacey said, back to her quick, nervous talking. "But I'll see you later!"

* * *

Within the next week, Lacey only became later and later, unable to take a pregnancy test still. There was never a good time. Heather had been calling her a lot recently for help since Jack had started hockey practice again. If she wasn't with them, she was with Kelly, who she hadn't told yet. Not telling Kelly only added to her nerves. What was he going to do when he found out? On top of that, all hell had broken out in their apartment over the last few days.

Clarice was gone, off to New York with the baby after Daniel threatened to fight her for custody. Shay was a mess and understandably so. This was the second time that Clarice had broken her heart. After becoming so close with Shay, Lacey really hated Clarice right now; Kelly wasn't too happy with Clarice either. The next day, while Kelly went out to spend time with his dad, Shay was busy getting rid of the rest of Clarice's things from the apartment. She disappeared late in the afternoon, giving Lacey just enough time to run down the block to the nearest pharmacy, buying a pregnancy test without anymore awkward run ins.

Now that she bought it, she just stood in the bathroom and stared at the packaging. It just seemed to stare back at her. At this point, Lacey knew what the odds were. If being over a week late wasn't enough, the daily fits of morning sickness were. Finally taking the test, she sat on the bed and waited, leaving the test on the counter in the bathroom. It was the longest two minutes of her life. She sat on the edge of the bed, bouncing; she got up and paced. She stared at herself in the mirror above the dresser. Two minutes clicked past on the alarm clock on the nightstand, sending her back into the bathroom to look at the results.

Positive.

"Anyone home?!" Shay called from downstairs, making Lacey jump, her thoughts of motherhood and how to tell the father disrupted. She wiped her eyes, checking to make sure they weren't too red before going downstairs. She stopped at the door, going back to carefully hide the pregnancy test in the trash, hiding the box in the bottom of her purse.

"Hey," Shay greeted Lacey as she came downstairs. "Kelly still out?"

"With his dad," Lacey nodded, distracted. His dad. Now, Kelly was going to be a dad, Benny was going to be a grandfather. The nausea hit again.

"Well, that's just as well," Shay said, unpacking the grocery bags she had on the counter. She had various junk food, a large frozen pizza, and all the ingredients needed for margaritas.

"You're a better drinking partner," Shay smiled at her, going to get out the blender.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Lacey asked. She wasn't sure it was such a good way for Shay to deal with her break up with Clarice. And, in addition to that, Lacey couldn't drink.

"This is nothing," Shay laughed, brushing it off. The last few days, she was either extremely upset, or trying to act like she wasn't upset by plastering a smile on her face. "The last time me and Clarice broke up, I dragged Kelly with me to go get a tattoo."

"Did you-"

"No," Shay laughed, pouring margarita mix over the ice in the blender.

"Then maybe you shouldn't do this," Lacey reasoned as Shay grabbed the tequila now.

There was no way Lacey was up for explaining to Shay why she wasn't drinking. She was nervous enough about being pregnant, not even sure how she was going to tell Kelly, who should know first. Plus, it just seemed mean of the universe to do this to Shay. She was so excited for Clarice's baby, ready to be a step mom. And now, Clarice was gone and her roommate was about to become a parent? It was unfair.

"Like you've never drank after a break up," Shay scoffed, pouring the tequila into the blender now.

"I'm just saying..." She trailed off as Shay started the blender.

"It'll be fun," Shay told her once the blender was off, going over to the cupboard to grab the plastic margarita glasses they had left from some random "fiesta" they had thrown at the apartment once.

"Why are you being so weird?" Shay asked, pouring two drinks for them.

"I'm just not in the mood to drink," Lacey shrugged.

"You're my margarita buddy," Shay insisted, pouting for effect. "Please?"

"I..." Lacey didn't know what to do. "Can't."

"Why can't you..." Shay trailed off when she realized. "Oh. My-"

"Don't freak out," Lacey pleaded. The last thing she needed was for someone else to be flipping out about this.

"God!" Shay finished with a squeal, a smile on her face. "How did Kelly not tell me yet?" Lacey bit her lip. "Oh _no_..."

"I didn't want to tell you first," Lacey pointed out. Shay opened her mouth to say something, but the door to the apartment opened now, Kelly and Benny coming inside.

"Hey girls," Kelly said as they came over to the counter with them. "Did we interrupt a margarita night?" he laughed.

"Oh, these are both mine," Shay told him, picking up both glasses and Kelly raised his eye brows at her. "Do you want to start with me right now?"

"Nope," Kelly shook his head, letting his roommate be. She set one of the glasses on the counter, drinking from the other one.

"How are you Lacey?" Benny asked her, smiling. He thought she was sweet and knew her family well, having worked with her father previously. Before, he had only ever met one of Kelly's girlfriends, Renee. They had been engaged, but then she and Kelly broke up just before the wedding. Benny knew that Kelly must be serious about Lacey, based just on the fact that he got to meet her and spend time with her.

"I'm good," Lacey nodded, only giving a small smile back. She was so uncomfortable right now. Shay knew she was pregnant, before Kelly did. No matter how you looked at it, it wasn't good.

"You're not still sick, are you?" Kelly asked, moving his arm from around her shoulders so he could feel her head.

"Oh, I'm fine," Lacey assured him as he put his arm back around her, kissing her head.

"You're going to be able to make it to the dinner tomorrow, right?" Benny asked; Lacey nodded. The following night was the Academy Dinner. Kelly always went, being a lieutenant, and normally took Shay as his date. Now, he was taking Lacey with him. Since Benny was invited though, he had an extra ticket so Shay could go anyway.

"Are your parents going?" Benny asked.

"I don't think," Lacey shook her head. "They still have a hard time, um, with CFD events." Benny nodded in understanding. "I think Heather's going though."

"That's good," Benny nodded.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Kelly asked Lacey suspiciously.

"Oh yeah, I'm just tired," she promised him, kissing his cheek. "I think I'm going to go lay down."

* * *

Lacey wasn't sure what to do, when to tell Kelly. What would she even say? She only ever had the "I'm late" talk once with one of her college boyfriends, turning out obviously that she wasn't pregnant. Even though she wasn't pregnant, the talk didn't go well. She remembered the awful details, how Eric had been visiting Chicago for a few weeks that summer, walking out of her house when she told him about it. She had to go to Heather to get a test, afraid to go alone at the time since she was only twenty one. Of course, Heather told Andy. And, of course, when Eric showed up at the house to talk to Lacey later, Andy broke his nose.

It left a bad taste in her mouth for any future "I'm late" or "I'm pregnant" talks. If she was married or engaged it would be different. But, she and Kelly had only been together seven months. And, while they loved each other and lived together, she still didn't know what he was going to do. Was he going to be happy about having a baby? Just two weeks ago when Clarice had her baby, Kelly commented to Lacey how hard it was going to be to have kids, how he was glad it was Shay and Clarice having the babies for now. He certainly didn't seem like he was ready for parenthood.

"Do you have any earrings I can borrow?" Shay asked Lacey from the doorway. Shay was wearing a long, deep blue strapless dress; she looked gorgeous.

"Um, yeah," Lacey nodded over at the jewelry box on the dresser. Shay began to root through the box, though Lacey knew this wasn't about earrings. "Can you zip me?" Lacey's dress was also strapless, but it was black; her dress was shorter too, stopping at her knees.

"Sure," Shay nodded, zipping up the back of Lacey's dress before Lacey sat down to put on her heels. "You haven't talked to him yet, have you?" Shay finally asked.

"I can't," Lacey shook her head.

"I get that you're freaked out," Shay assured her. "But, it's Kelly we're talking about. He's not going to walk out, or whatever it is you're afraid of."

"I'll tell him when I tell him," Lacey said, putting her angel necklace back on, only ever taking it off when she slept or showered.

"Hey!" Kelly called up the stairs. "You girls ready yet?!" Benny had already gone, meeting up with some of his old friends at the dinner. Kelly was downstairs, dressed in his suit, waiting for the women of his life to come downstairs. Without talking about the baby anymore, Shay lead the way out of the room and downstairs.

"Damn," Kelly commented as Shay and Lacey came downstairs. "I'm going to have the best looking dates there!" He kissed Shay's cheek before taking Lacey's hand and pulling her close; he couldn't figure out why she was so stand offish lately.

"You look great," he told her.

"So do you," she smiled at him, straightening out his tie.

"All right," Kelly said once she was done. "So, rock, paper, scissors for DD?" They always did this when they went out and would be drinking.

"Well, you were DD last time," Shay said quickly, coming to Lacey's aid. "So, it's between me and Lace." With Kelly looking at Shay, Lacey mouthed out the word _rock_ to Shay.

"Ready, go," Shay said. She did paper and Lacey did rock, Lacey losing and having to be designated driver. At least it gave her a good excuse for the night as to why she wasn't drinking.

* * *

One thing Lacey was grateful for at this event was no one brought any of their kids. There weren't any visibly pregnant women there either, so that kept her from freaking out. At least, she wasn't freaking out as much. Spotting Dawson, Shay excused herself to go say hi. Seeing Casey and Heather, though surprised they were together, Lacey and Kelly went over to say hi to them. Leaving the guys alone, Heather asked Lacey to come over to the bar with her to get a drink.

"What's with you?" Heather asked once they were alone, waiting at the bar while others finished ordering their drinks.

"Nothing," Lacey shook her head. "Just...still not used to these events." Heather nodded. There they were, Darden widow and Darden sister. All that was missing were the mourning parents. It didn't help that an any event they went to, people were always _sorry_ or telling them _how great Andy was_.

"Drink to take the edge off?" Heather offered lightly, squeezing her sister in law's hand.

"I'm DD," Lacey shook it off. Heather eyed her curiously.

"There's something else with you," Heather said. After all, Heather had known Lacey since she was fourteen; she knew when something was up. Then, she recognized that look. That panic in her eye, like when she told Heather about Eric back in college. "Oh my God!" Heather gasped in a loud whisper. "Are you..."

"Shh!" Lacey pleaded, looking around to make sure no one else heard; they hadn't. "I just...I haven't..." Now this was two people to know before Kelly.

"Oh, Lace," Heather said sympathetically.

"What happened, when you told Andy about Jack?" Lacey asked. She never heard that story, she was just around whenever they told her parents and everyone was thrilled about the news.

"He was really excited," Heather told her. "But...we had been trying for awhile..."

"Ugh," Lacey groaned, looking over at Kelly who was talking with Casey and Chief Boden. Catching his eye, he smiled at her; she smiled back weakly.

"Tell him tonight," Heather told her. Lacey knew she was right. At this rate, all of Chicago was going to find out before the father did.

* * *

"Tonight was fun," Kelly commented once they were finally upstairs.

"Mhmm," Lacey nodded quietly, happy to be taking off her heels.

"Hey," Kelly stopped her. He was sitting on the edge of their bed and she stood by the dresser. "What's been going on with you?"

"Nothing," she shook her head. She still didn't have any words.

"C'mon Lacey," Kelly complained. He thought they were past this, but now it felt like the weeks after Andy's accident, when she shut him out completely.

"I don't want to talk about it," Lacey told him, confirming that something was wrong, even though Kelly had already known that.

"You know you can tell me," Kelly insisted. Lacey wouldn't look at him, staring down at her feet. "Baby, come on."

"Oh my God," Lacey involuntarily shuddered. "Please don't call me that." Kelly looked at her in confusion.

"I always call-"

"Kelly, I'm pregnant," Lacey finally snapped, unable to take it anymore. He didn't jump for joy, like Andy had over Jack and Sean. He didn't run out of the apartment, looking pissed off like Eric had when she was late. He didn't do anything.

He just stared at her.

**thanks for reading! :) what do you think? please review! :)**


	11. The Next Step

**thanks so much for the reviews, follows, and favorite! and thanks to those who followed me! :) they mean so much! hope you like this update :) **

_The Next Step_

"Can you say something?" Lacey finally asked. It felt like Kelly had just been staring at her for hours, when really it had only been about twenty seconds. She understood though, having about a million thoughts racing through her own head. She couldn't even imagine what was going through Kelly's mind, someone who, until this past summer, seemed destined to always be a bachelor.

"Ok," Lacey continued, maybe a second later. It felt to her like Kelly was taking way to long to answer though, and that was making her even more anxious. "If you're freaking out too, could you at least say that you're freaking out, or something, because I-"

"Hey, hey, whoa," Kelly said, getting her to stop as he stood up, walking over to her. "Don't freak out, all right?"

"Don't freak out?" she repeated, scoffing a bit. "Don't freak out? Kelly, I'm-"

"Pregnant," he nodded, then shrugged a bit. "That's...ok."

"Ok?" Lacey snapped, not sure what she was flipping out for. At least he wasn't running out of the room screaming. "Ok, just like that?"

"Yeah?" Kelly said in questioning, laughing a bit. "One of us should be calm here Lace." He looked her over once with a half smile, taking her hand. "And, it's not you."

"Kelly," Lacey complained. "Seroiusly, I have no idea what to do..."

"You think I do?" Kelly said, trying to assure her that he had no idea what he was doing, and that was ok. "I mean, granted, I've got a couple kids around the city. But, that doesn't make me a good dad," Kelly joked.

"Kelly!"

"Ok, ok, that was bad," Kelly admitted with a smile, squeezing her hand. "But, _seriously_ Lace, it's going to be fine."

"You think so?" Lacey asked, still biting her lip nervously. How could he possibly know that everything was going to be ok?

"Yeah!" Kelly promised, releasing her hand so he could take her face in his hands. "Yes, babe, it's a huge surprise. But who says surprises aren't a good thing?" He kissed her forehead. "Us getting together was a surprise, right? And, that's worked out pretty great."

"Ok," Lacey nodded hesitantly, impending motherhood still making her extremely nervous. Kelly wasn't over the moon about her being pregnant either, but he wasn't running away; he was going to stay with her.

"Hey," Kelly smiled, getting her to look at him; he kissed her once. "I love you, all right? We'll be fine."

* * *

Two days later on Monday while he was on shift, Kelly had absolutely no idea what he was doing. Truthfully, he hadn't known what to do since Lacey told him the news on Saturday night. A baby? He was going to be a father? Obviously, he was going to stay with Lacey, they were going to do this together; that wasn't in question. But, what else was he supposed to do now? Would they have to move and find a place of their own to stay? Would they get married?

He had no idea how to be a parent, his father not being the best example, especially once he was grown and his mother was gone. What he would give to talk to her about this right now, she would know what to say to make him feel less nervous. He didn't know the first thing about taking care of a baby. He remembered making the comment to Lacey in the hospital that it was better Shay and Clarice than them; now he felt like an idiot.

Lacey had called Heather to get the name of her doctor, making an appointment for Tuesday afternoon; she was going to get a substitute for the afternoon and Kelly would be off shift anyway. And, even though Heather knew already, they asked her family to have dinner that night so they could tell them the news. He couldn't imagine telling people, particularly telling her father. He knew that Mr. Darden liked him, but no father liked his daughter's boyfriend _that_ much, to be one hundred percent ok with it. Kelly half expected Andy to come back, just to kick his ass.

"Hey, Severide," Casey said, getting his attention. Kelly had been sitting at the table in the common room, staring into his corn flakes. He looked up to Casey who was sitting across from him. "You all right man? You look like you're about to be sick."

"Huh?" Kelly asked, still about half dazed. "Oh...yeah, I'm fine."

"You sure?" Casey asked with a bit of a laugh, never seeing Kelly this thrown off before. They had drawn the attention of the others in the room. Since they hadn't told anyone other than Shay yet, Kelly wasn't sure he should be telling the others at the firehouse about Lacey yet.

"Yeah, fine," Kelly confirmed, getting up now to dump out his uneaten cereal in the sink. "I'm, ah, gonna go finish up the paper work on that last call." Kelly announced this, giving him an excuse to leave the room and go back to his quarters to be alone. Walking through the hall alone, he could hear someone behind him.

"Hey, Kelly," he heard someone saying. He turned to see Hermann coming up to talk to him. "You doing all right?"

"Yeah," Kelly nodded, maybe to enthusiastically to prove his point; Hermann eyed him suspiciously.

"Is Lacey pregnant?" Hermann finally asked; Kelly seemed surprised.

"How did you know that?" Kelly asked in confusion.

"I caught her at the pharmacy last week, having a stare down with with pregnancy tests," Hermann chuckled. "And, I had that same look on my face about nine years ago."

"Yeah?" Kelly asked now. There were few members of the firehouse that had kids, so he didn't have anyone to talk to. He hadn't even thought about talking to his dad about it. Benny wouldn't tell him anything that he didn't already know, that he had to stay with Lacey and take care of her. That didn't tell him anything about actually being a dad though.

"Oh yeah," Hermann laughed. "Cindy and I were married about a year, then she told me she was pregnant with Lee Henry." He shook his head. "And, don't get me wrong, I was excited." Kelly nodded. "But, I had no idea how to take care of a kid." He smiled at Kelly now. "But, having a baby is one of the best things. You'll see," he added.

* * *

"Are you feeling ok?" Kelly asked Lacey. He had picked her up at the school that afternoon, taking her to her doctor's appointment. They were sitting in the exam room, waiting for the doctor to come in now, after they talked to the nurse. Lacey was sitting on the table, leaning back against the part that was propped up while Kelly stood off to the side.

"Fine," Lacey shrugged. "I hardly felt sick this morning." She smiled at Kelly, who got up to make her breakfast; he had been extra sweet the last few days. "I think the toast helped."

"Good," Kelly nodded, still seeming nervous.

"Are _you_ feeling ok?" Lacey asked.

"Do you wanna get married?" Kelly blurted out.

"Huh?" Lacey asked in confusion.

"I mean...is that something you want...now, that um..."

"I'm pregnant?" Lacey asked with raised eye brows. "I mean, this is how I always pictured being asked. Laying on a doctor's table in a paper dress."

"I can...ask again?" Kelly offered; Lacey bit her lip.

"Kelly," she said quietly. "I'm really glad..." She wasn't sure how to say it, afraid she would hurt him. "You've been so sweet, and amazing during this. But..." She hesitated again. "I don't want to get married because we think we have to. You know?" She reached over and grabbed Kelly's hand. "I'm sorry, I just-"

"No, no," Kelly shook his head quickly. "It's ok, I just wanted to know...what you wanted." He held her hand tight, smiling at her. "Baby steps." Lacey laughed a little.

"Aw," she giggled at the mention of baby steps. There was then a knock at the door.

"Hi," the doctor smiled as she came in, wearing a lab coat over her scrubs, her blonde hair pulled back in a tight pony tail. "Can I come in?" Both Kelly and Lacey nodded. "I am Dr. Hooper." She smiled as she shook hands with Lacey. "You must be Lacey."

"Hi," Lacey said back.

"And that makes you Kelly," Dr. Hooper greeted him, shaking his hand now as well.

"Nice to meet you," Kelly replied.

"You as well," she said back, pulling a chair over so she could sit next to the table where Lacey was. "So..." She glanced over Lacey's medical chart briefly. "First time parents?"

"Yes," Lacey smiled, letting out a deep breath to calm her new nerves, now that the doctor was here. It all seemed to be so much more real.

"Well, I'm sure you're both very excited," Dr. Hooper smiled at them both. Kelly wondered if she smiled to much to put new, nerve racked parents like them at ease. "And, maybe a little nervous?" she teased. "But, don't worry, that's all perfectly natural. Right now, I just want to go over a few things with you, before we do the ultrasound." She looked at the chart again before looking back at Lacey. "So, Lacey, do you have an idea of how far along you are?"

"Um," Lacey thought about it. "I think...about five or six weeks?"

"Good," Dr. Hooper nodded. "So, at this point, you're baby is about this big." She held up her little finger, pointing at her nail.

"Wow," Kelly commented with raised eye brows, though he hadn't meant to say it out loud. "Sorry..."

"No," Dr. Hooper laughed. "It's really amazing. And, even though he or she is that small, they're heart is already beating."

"Seriously?" Lacey asked now.

"Mhmm," the doctor nodded. "Their arms and legs are starting to form, as well as their little face. Their eyes and ears..." She set the folder containing Lacey's chart to the side. "Do you want to see?" Kelly and Lacey both nodded.

The doctor prepared to do the ultrasound, Kelly and Lacey both quiet. Kelly felt Lacey reach for his hand again and he squeezed back tight, knowing her nerves were kicking in again. He was nervous as well, feeling the knot in his stomach. It was with Lacey though, so that alone made him excited, leaning over and kissing the side of her head.

"All right," Dr. Hooper drew their attention back to the screen. She made a circle with her finger around a small, white shape on the mostly black screen. "Right here, is your baby."

"Wow," Lacey said in amazement, feeling Kelly lean closer next to her to look; she turned her heads towards him. "Do you see that?"

"I do," Kelly nodded in quiet awe, also able to hear the baby's heart beating; his baby. It was more real now than it had ever been. And, just like that, he wasn't really scared anymore.

* * *

After the doctor's appointment, Kelly and Lacey returned to the apartment. Shay was home and she wanted to hear everything about the doctor's appointment, thrilled for her roommates that they were having a baby; she couldn't wait to spoil that baby rotten. While Lacey kept gushing to Shay about how amazing it was, Kelly hung up the picture from Lacey's ultrasound on the refrigerator. His baby's first picture.

Soon, they were off to dinner at Lacey's parents' home. Heather was already there with the boys, who were running around the house like crazy. Kelly wondered what he and Lacey would have, a boy or a girl. He loved Andy's kids, but they could be a handful. Maybe a little part of him was rooting for a girl. Once they got there, it wasn't long before dinner was ready. Lacey's parents sat at either end of the table, while Kelly and Lacey sat on one side, Heather and the kids on the other. Heather kept eyeing Lacey, smiling as she waited for the news to come out.

"So, honey," Sarah said to Lacey, not having seen her for a few days. "What have you been up to?"

"Well," Lacey said, deciding this was the right time; she reached over and held Kelly's hand on the table. "Kelly and I...actually have some news."

"What kind of news?" Mark asked curiously. He was happy about the baby, but Kelly still couldn't help but be nervous about Lacey's dad. Traditional man that he was, he probably expected Lacey and Kelly to get married. He wouldn't be too thrilled about their decision to wait.

"Um," Lacey hesitated, still nervous about telling her parents. She wondered what they would think.

"We're having a baby," Kelly stepped in, knowing she was nervous and after all, it was his news too.

"Really?" Sarah asked, an instant grin on her face; Lacey nodded. "Oh, another baby!" she said with delight, getting up to hug her daughter.

"We're going to have a cousin?" Jack was asking Heather and she nodded happily to him and Sean.

"Isn't this great news?" Sarah asked her husband, hugging Kelly then standing behind the soon to be parents chairs.

"Of course it is," Mark nodded, though Kelly could tell that there was something behind that face. He was fully expecting a talk from his girlfriend's father later in the evening, whenever they were alone. "Congratulations sweetheart." He gave Kelly a half smile. "Congratulations Kelly."

"Thank you sir," Kelly nodded. Maybe he wasn't lying to Lacey before when he told her that everything was going to work out ok.

**thanks for reading! :) hope you liked the update, please let me know what you thought! **


	12. When It Rains, It Pours

**thanks so much for the reviews and follows! it means so much to me to hear from you! hope you like this update :) (i'm bringing in some stuff from the start of season 2 now so...potential SPOILERS if you haven't watched yet!)**

_When It Rains, It Pours_

Heather had left the house with the boys, leaving Kelly and Lacey there with her parents. Lacey went into the kitchen with Sarah to help her clean up from dinner, her mother continuing to gush about her excitement for the new baby. Sarah didn't care if Lacey and Kelly were married or not. She was just thrilled to be getting another grandchild. Mark, however, wasn't as enthused as his wife.

Sure, he was glad to be having another grandchild and he was happy for his daughter. The way he looked at it though, his son's best friend, who had pretty much grown up in the Darden house with them, had been sneaking around with his daughter. Then, they moved in together after they had only dated a few months. And, now, she was pregnant; as of now, there wasn't a ring on her finger. He might be happy for Lacey, but it wasn't exactly a father's dream come true for his little girl.

"I know what you're thinking Mr. Darden," Kelly said first as they sat in the living room alone. Kelly hoped that speaking up first would help settle his nerves; it hadn't.

"You wouldn't know," Mark shook his head. "Not until after that baby is born and you're a father."

"I love your daughter sir," Kelly told him right away. "We've already talked to our other roommate, we're going to start looking for our own place. And-"

"Are you going to get married?" Mark interrupted. That was what he wanted to know.

"I asked," Kelly admitted to him. "But, we decided that we wanted to wait. We don't want to get married because we feel like we have to."

"Uh huh," Mark nodded, looking the young lieutenant over. He was clearly skeptical of this entire plan. "You love her?"

"More than anything," Kelly nodded.

"Then you better take good care of both of them," Mark said back.

* * *

It had been two months since the news about the baby broke.

Lacey was home alone that morning, Kelly and Shay already having left to go on shift; she was home now for spring break. This upcoming weekend, Lacey and Kelly were going to be moving into their own place. The timing was perfect, with the lease up on the apartment; Shay had a place of her own already lined up. Today was Lacey's weekly doctor's appointment and Kelly was disappointed he wasn't able to go with her. She reminded him that there would be plenty of opportunities for him to go with her and that she would be fine on her own today.

Sitting on the table waiting for the doctor, Lacey couldn't help but occasionally bounce with excitement. With everything working out, she was starting to get really excited about having a baby and she knew that Kelly was too. Her doctor was busy with another patient, so a nurse came in to get her appointment started, even pulling up her ultrasound. The nurse was very quiet and Lacey figured it was just her demeanor as she excused herself to get Dr. Hooper. While Lacey thought that it was odd, she didn't really think much of it.

"Hi Doctor Hooper," Lacey smiled at her when she came back with the nurse. Dr. Hooper only gave a half smile back, which immediately alarmed Lacey since that woman was almost all smiles. She pulled up the ultrasound again, looking closely at the screen. Right now, Lacey thought that the sound might not be on since they hadn't heard a heart beat yet. When Dr. Hooper looked at her though, she knew that it was something else.

"What is it?" Lacey asked in immediate concern, though she wasn't stupid. She needed to hear it though, to confirm it.

"I am...so sorry Lacey," Dr. Hooper told her sadly. And that was all Lacey needed to hear to make the tears well up in her eyes.

* * *

Immediately leaving the office, Lacey drove to the firehouse. She couldn't go home and wait, she needed to find Kelly and talk to him right away. It was hard to believe that, two months ago, she wasn't even sure she was ready to have a baby. And now, just as she and Kelly had started to make the appropriate plans and get excited, she had lost it. Her baby was gone, before she even had a chance to meet them. Life could be so unfair.

"Hey Lacey," Shay greeted her with a grin as she came into the common room. "How-"

"Where's Kelly?" Lacey cut her off. She wasn't trying to be mean, but she needed to get to Kelly before the floodgates opened back up. Shay pointed back the hall and Lacey sped off in that direction, knowing Kelly was most likely in his quarters for now. Matt tried to stop her to say hi, but she pushed right by him.

"What's up with her?" Casey asked Shay once Lacey had gone.

"Something's wrong," Shay said uneasily; she knew that the doctor's appointment had been today.

Lacey walked back the hall, avoiding eye contact with anyone that passed her. She hadn't let anything out since the doctor's office, only welling up during her appointment. But now, thinking of Kelly and telling him the news, she felt like she was just going to erupt in a fit of tears.

"Hey!" Kelly grinned when he saw her coming. He was excited to hear about her appointment. Ever since the news really set in, Kelly was beyond thrilled to be having this baby with Lacey. They had even planned to name the baby Andy, if it was a boy. When Kelly saw her face though, the tears threatening to spill out of her eyes, he knew that something wasn't right.

"What's wrong?" he asked right away, bringing her into the room and closing the door behind her. "What's going on?"

"Kelly, I can't..." She broke off into sobs, tears streaming down her face, choking on her words as she attempted to speak. "I'm so sorry...I-"

"Hey, hey," Kelly said, taking her face in his hands as he tried to wipe the tears off her face but they just kept coming. "Don't be, don't be sorry." He didn't even know what happened or what she could have done, but with how upset she was he was never going to be angry with her. He pulled her in to kiss her forehead. "Just tell me what happened," Kelly pleaded, sick with worry himself.

"I..." Lacey still struggled for the words, more tears surfacing. "I lost the baby Kelly," she finally told him.

"What?" Kelly asked softly, feeling his heart stop.

"She said it could just happen," Lacey said, wiping off her face as she talked about the doctor. "That no one did anything..." She started thinking about it more and more again, another flood of tears ready. "But...but I don't know...if there's..s...something wrong with me or-"

"No," Kelly shook his head in protest, though he honestly had no idea himself. "Come here," he pulled her into his chest, just letting her cry. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with you," Kelly promised her. He didn't want her to think that it was her fault that they weren't going to have a baby. That wasn't fair.

"I'm sorry," Kelly told her sympathetically, running his hands up and down her back. "I'm so sorry babe." He kissed her head. "It's all right...it's all..." He knew that it was a lie.

* * *

It had been a few days, since Lacey had told Kelly what happened. He took it on himself to tell everyone, stopping to talk to her parents after the shift and calling Heather. She was upset enough as it was, he didn't want her to have to go through that process of reliving the news again and again.

With the move coming up, he was even quick to hide the boxes of stuff they had already gotten for the baby. A lot of it was stuff left by Clarice that she and Shay had bought, a crib, a changing table. There was other stuff too, stuffed animals Sarah couldn't wait to start getting. The last thing he packed up before Lacey got home was something from his co-workers, a white onesie with CFD on the middle. Finally taking a moment to feel sad himself, Kelly felt a couple stray tears slip out of his eyes. He had been excited for the baby too.

Kelly got back from the storage unit in just enough time to find Lacey at the house. Her dad had come, helping them with the move. They were only moving a few blocks away, to a new building into an apartment that was about the same size. It didn't have the spiral staircase though, they didn't want that for when they had the baby. Instead, it was just one floor. Walking in, there was the large sitting room and then the kitchen to the left. To the right was a hall that lead back to the bathroom, master bedroom, and then the extra room. Once Mark had gone and Kelly had thanked him for the help, Kelly caught Lacey staring into the empty bedroom. He walked up behind her, putting his arms around her middle.

"You all right?" he murmured. Clearly, she wasn't and hadn't been for days, barely talking to anyone. She just nodded.

"We can get some of my old furniture from my parents' house," Lacey said, turning to him. "Make it a guest room." Kelly's expression softened.

"We can try again," Kelly told her. "If you wanted." He knew that he wanted to eventually, since right now wasn't the right time to try that again.

"I don't know if I'm ready for that yet," Lacey admitted and Kelly nodded, kissing her forehead.

"I don't have to go in tomorrow," Kelly told her, since he was on shift the next day. He had finished his shift after he found out the news, but once Chief Boden found out what happened, he told Kelly he didn't have to come in for the next shift if he needed to take some time off with Lacey. "I can stay here, we can get the place set up."

"It's ok," Lacey shook her head. "I, um, have the boys tomorrow."

"Right," Kelly nodded, remembering now. The next day was Andy's birthday. Having a hard time with it, Heather's friends were taking her out, making her celebrate it rather than feel sad about it. Lacey had volunteered to watch her nephews, not really wanting to go out after what happened or spend her brother's birthday that way.

* * *

Kelly left for work the next morning, feeling bad for leaving Lacey alone. After everything that happened in the last few days, and now today would have been Andy's thirtieth birthday. She wasn't someone that liked to be smothered though, so she asked him to leave her alone and he left it. Figuring a night with her nephews was what she needed, he went in on his shift not thinking much else of it.

Lacey was trying as hard as she could to feel as normal as possible. When Heather dropped of Jack and Sean that afternoon, she took them out immediately to rent movies to watch all night and get popcorn; she even let them rent the scary movies that their mom wouldn't let them watch, but not too scary. Bringing them back, she ordered pizza for them, just enjoying being an aunt for now. Spending time with the boys though, made Lacey want something more. She wanted to be a mom, she wanted to have kids with Kelly. The doctor had told her if she wanted to try again, she would have to wait a few weeks, but Lacey definitely wanted the spare room to be a nursery, not a guest room.

Falling asleep that night on the couch, Jack had his head on her shoulder and Sean had curled up with a pillow in her lap. Her phone buzzing on the coffee table was what woke her, making her carefully move around so she didn't wake up the boys. By the time she had maneuvered her way off the couch, she had missed the call but saw that it was from Kelly. Confused about why he was calling her this late, she immediately called him back, stepping into their bedroom so her voice didn't wake the kids.

"Hey," she said when he answered. "What's going on? Are you all right?" It was close to one in the morning. Now that she thought about it, where the hell was Heather? She was supposed to pick up the boys at eleven.

_"We have kind of a situation,"_ Kelly said, not sure how to tell her. He wanted to tell her in person, but couldn't leave his shift and he didn't want her to bring the boys to the house. This was the only way to do it.

"What kind of situation?" Lacey asked in confusion.

_"We got a call tonight, about an accident,"_ Kelly tried to explain. _"A DUI."_ He sighed. _"Lace, Heather was driving."_

"What?!" Lacey gasped in complete shock. "Is she on her way to the hospital or-"

_"She wasn't hurt,"_ Kelly went on._ "They..."_ He was still shocked by all this as well. _"They arrested her Lace, they had to."_

"Oh my God," Lacey sighed, sinking onto their bed. "What should I do?" She had no idea what was going to happen next. "Should I call my parents, get her bailed out or..."

_"They're not going to let her out right now,"_ Kelly said gently._ "The, um...the other passenger, she didn't make it."_ Lacey didn't have any words. _"Heather's looking at manslaughter."_

"Oh my God Kelly," Lacey said, running a hand through her hair. "What do I tell the boys?"

_"Tell them, they got to have a sleepover,"_ Kelly came up with the idea quickly. _"I'll be home in the morning, I'll try to talk to them."_

"Ok," Lacey sighed, falling back onto the bed. "Love you."

_"I love you too,"_ Kelly told her. _"Just try to get some sleep."_

* * *

Kelly knew that was some crappy advice, knowing that he wasn't going to be sleeping that night. Everything that happened with the baby was hard enough. Now, with what was going on with Heather, everything felt like it was spiraling out of control. He had other concerns too. Earlier in the day, their first call on shift, was a fire in their district. It just seemed like another fire, but very quickly it looked to be arson. And strangely, and pretty frightening, his badge number was spray painted on the side of the building.

Not able to sleep anymore, Kelly got up and went out to the common area. There were left overs from dinner in the refrigerator, so he started picking through them. A couple of the other guys were up, watching tv. They nodded hello to him, but didn't say much else. No one really knew what to say to him these days.

"Do you guys smell that?" Kelly asked. He had smelled this before, it was the same smell of the chemicals used to start the fire at the house they went to earlier that day. Going outside to investigate, they quickly saw what the smell was coming from. Someone had set fire to Kelly's car.

"Oh _shit_!"

The firefighters all ran back inside, getting the fire extinguisher until they could back the truck out and use the hose. Kelly knew for sure now, he was the target of an arson.

* * *

The boys were up bright and early the next morning. Lacey explained to them that their mom wasn't feeling well so she let them sleepover with her. After making them pancakes for breakfast, she told them that Kelly would be back soon. They were excited for that, hoping to hang out with their uncle. They had no idea what was going on though and it broke Lacey's heart.

"Hey," Kelly nodded when he entered. Casey had dropped him off, with Kelly not wanting Lacey to have to come get him. He was carrying an envelope that had been taped to their door.

"What's that?" Lacey asked as he opened it. As Kelly read the letter, he started laughing. It was a funny laugh though, it was more of a you have to be kidding me laugh. "What?"

"We have to move," Kelly told her, handing her the letter as he explained. "They sold our building and we have thirty days to relocate."

"But we just moved in!" Lacey complained, keeping her voice low since Sean and Jack were at the table having breakfast still. "Why would they let us sign a lease last month if they were going to sell the building."

"Because they weren't selling it last month," Kelly shrugged, frustrated. "We need to talk about something Lace." He had to tell her about the arsonist.

"We do," she agreed, though she nodded her head back at the table. Kelly knew that talking to the boys came first. And, really, they should be alone to talk about the things that were going on with the fires.

"Hey Kelly!" Sean called from the table, waving at him.

"Hey guys," Kelly said, half smiling at them as he went over to sit. Lacey walked over with him, standing by our chair.

"What are we doing today?" Sean asked.

"Where's our mom?" Jack added now.

"Your mom," Kelly said slowly, looking between the two of them, their eyes big and innocent. "She's ok," Kelly added right away. "But, um, she had an accident with her car last night."

"Is she at the hospital?" Jack asked.

"No," Kelly said hesitantly. How did you tell two kids that their mom had been arrested?

"Someone else got hurt," Lacey interjected now. "So she, um, has to stay with the police...for awhile." Kelly looked up at Lacey and she shrugged. He hadn't exactly come up with a better plan on what to tell them.

"Mom got arrested?" Jack asked, being the older of the two boys and clearly not stupid. Sean was still too little to get it.

"Everything is going to be fine," Kelly lied. How was he even supposed to know that? These days though, it just came out of his mouth naturally. "You guys...are just going to stay with me and your Aunt Lacey for awhile."

_Or maybe we'll be staying with them_, Lacey thought internally, remembering that they were being kicked out of their building.

**thanks for reading! :) so...what did you think? please let me know! :)**


	13. New Parents

**thanks so much for the reviews, follows, and favorites! :) really glad that you like the story, hope you like this update :) sorry for the wait, thanks for being patient! **

_New Parents_

"We can't take on their mortgage Lace," Kelly was telling Lacey, a stack of papers between them on the table. The boys were upstairs in bed now, a long day for the both of them. Heather had taken a deal, pleading guilty to the man slaughter charges. She would only be in jail for 15 months rather than five to ten years.

"Then, do we move again?" Lacey asked. They had just moved into the Darden house two days before, barely able to unpack. "Move them?"

"We're going to have to," Kelly sighed. "I know...it's not ideal Lace, but we can't afford a house right now."

"No, I know," Lacey agreed, rubbing her forehead. "I just wish they didn't have to leave this place."

When Jack was born, Andy and Heather had decided to make Lacey the one that would take care of him if something were to happen to them. She had thought that it had been a joke, since she was only sixteen at the time. But Andy told her that he was serious and that he knew that she would take the best care of his kids. And, as soon as she was eighteen, they made it official. So now, with Andy gone and Heather unable to take care of them, Jack and Sean were legally hers. She had barely been ready for a new baby, now she had an eight and five year old to take care of? That terrified her.

* * *

"At least everything was still packed from the first time," Casey joked as he and a few others from the house were helping Kelly and Lacey move their belongings. They had found a small apartment last minute near the boys' school. It was only two bedroom though, so the boys weren't too thrilled about that. Lacey peered her head around a stack of boxes, glaring at him.

"Too soon?" he asked.

"Way too soon," Lacey told him, grabbing another box and carrying it outside where Dawson and Shay were, stopping to talk to them. Once she was gone, Casey turned to Kelly.

"Did you tell her?" Casey asked curiously. "About the arsonist?" Kelly shook his head. "What does she think happened to your car exactly?"

"Isolated incident," Kelly muttered, taping one of the opened boxes shut.

"C'mon Severide," Casey complained. "You remember what happened with your shoulder?"

"This is our third move in two weeks," Kelly nearly snapped at his friend. "Her sister in law got arrested for man slaughter and now we're suddenly parents." He sighed, rubbing his forehead. "And, suddenly not..." Casey nodded, his friend not needing to talk about losing the baby. "It just...already all sucks as it is so...that's just going to have to wait."

"What's going to have to wait?" Lacey asked, coming in.

"Moving the couch," Kelly told her and she nodded.

Deep down though, he knew he wasn't going to be able to keep the secret for long. He had already had his suspicions on who it might be, considering Peter Mills' family restaurant had just been set on fire two days before, the same as the fire that had started in Kelly's car and the building where his badge number was. The fires were all in their district and in dangerous buildings, if they weren't someone at 51's own property. He knew that it was a fire fighter and he knew who that fire fighter might be.

That night, after getting Lacey and the boys in their new apartment, he ran out saying that he would get take out for dinner. On the way though, he made a stop to talk to one of his old friends. He confronted Hadley about the fires, knowing that he would be the one that would have the problems with house 51. After all, he had been let go from there a few months prior and had trouble getting a job since. Rather than deny it though or tell Kelly he was crazy, he had only one thing to say. Prove it.

* * *

"I don't wanna go back!" Jack was complaining as Lacey was leading him and Sean both over to her car once school let out. Sean had been ok, but Jack had been especially hard to deal with lately. She understood though, losing his dad and now his mom, having to live with his aunt and share a room with his five year old brother. Saying that it sucked would be an understatement.

"I know," Lacey sighed, helping Sean into his side of the car first before walking around to the drivers side with Jack.

"The apartment sucks," Jack continued. "I don't want to share a room with Sean! Can't we live at home?"

"Honey, I know this is hard to understand-"

"I _HATE_ this!" Jack said, getting into the car and slamming his door with a huff as he sat in the backseat. Lacey sighed, rubbing her forehead as she went to open her door. Dropping her keys, she leaned over to get them and when she stood back up she jumped at the sight of someone in her window's reflection standing behind her.

"Jeez," she laughed, turning around. "Hadley, you scared the hell out of me." She adjusted her bag on her shoulder, holding onto her keys. "How are you? I haven't seen you since-"

"Kelly let me go?" Hadley asked with raised eye brows and Lacey bit her lip. It wasn't Kelly's decision, it was Boden's. She figured Hadley was mad that Kelly hadn't made Boden let him stay though.

"What are you doing here?" Lacey asked.

"Picking up Tina," Hadley said, referencing his niece. Lacey knew that was a lie. She had Tina in her class and they had a going away party for her a week ago, she was changing school districts.

"Uh huh," Lacey nodded, looking him over. He was different since the last time she saw him, changed. He was normally kind of silly, joking around with the other guys at work. She had thought he was pretty funny, but then again he could take things too far.

"I heard about Heather," Hadley continued. "What do you think Andy would say?" Lacey's eye brows furrowed in confusion.

"If Andy was around to say something, we wouldn't be in this right now," Lacey snapped. How dare he bring up her family like this. She had hardly known him outside the fire house. Who was he to talk to her this way, just because he was pissed off at Kelly?

"I meant about you, raising his kids with his best friend," Hadley corrected himself. "Because, I know if my friend was banging my-"

"Is there a reason you came over to talk to me?" Lacey snapped again. She was glad she was getting angry at him, because she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of bursting into tears over this. Things were hard enough as they were.

"I saw Kelly last night," Hadley informed her. "He was accusing me of some pretty serious stuff. You should get him to back off." Lacey didn't say anything, she didn't tell him to go away. Instead, she got into her car and locked the doors immediately. Hadley rolled his eyes, walking away as she started the car.

"Who was that?" Jack asked.

"He used to work with daddy!" Sean remembered him from the firehouse.

"Uh huh," Lacey nodded, wiping at her eyes before any tears could come out. "Listen, guys, we're going to have to stop some place on our way home."

"Where?" Sean asked curiously.

"We're going to see Uncle Kelly at work," Lacey started to say, which Sean immediately cheered about and Jack quickly protested.

* * *

Kelly was sitting and playing cards at the table when he heard someone running in, calling for him and getting his attention. He was happy to see Sean there, but he wondered what he was doing at the firehouse alone.

"Uncle Kellyyyyyy!" Sean called as he ran in excitedly, dropping his back pack.

"Hey!" Kelly laughed, getting up and picking Sean up to hug him. "What, man, did you ditch school or somethin'?"

"No," Sean laughed. "School's over!" Kelly noted the time as a few others waved hello to Sean.

"Where's your aunt and Jack?" Kelly asked as he set Sean down, kneeling to his level.

"Outside," Sean answered innocently. "Jack doesn't wanna come inside." He lowered his voice to a whisper, like anyone else wasn't allowed to hear. "I think he misses daddy a lot."

"Yeah," Kelly nodded in agreement.

"I miss him too," Sean clarified. "But, Jack's really mad." He thought about it. "And, I think Aunt Lacey is sad."

"Why's Aunt Lacey sad?" Kelly asked curiously. He knew Jack had been giving them both a hard time, but neither of them let it really get to them since they knew what he was dealing with.

"Someone yelled at her," Sean answered simply. Kelly could see the curious looks he was getting from Boden and Casey who were nearby. "At school."

"Do you know who?" Kelly asked him.

"He sat there," Sean pointed, not knowing his name off hand. He was pointing at the seat that Clarke had taken over since he had been assigned to the house. "His hair was red."

"Mhmm," Kelly nodded, looking over to Boden as he stood up. He had asked Boden earlier about questioning Hadley over the recent fires and Boden has basically said no way. With the recent confrontation of his girlfriend though, where she worked, it changed things a little bit. Boden just nodded, as if to say it was ok now.

"You know what," Kelly told Sean as he stood up. "I'm going to go check on Lacey and Jack, what if Matt showed you around the house?"

"How's that sound?" Casey asked, coming over closer now.

"Cool!" Sean smiled, following Casey over towards the truck as Kelly went outside. He spotted Jack sitting on the bench while Lacey was kneeling in front of him, talking softly. As he got closer, he could hear what she was saying to him.

"I get it," Lacey assured him. "You know that, right?" Jack nodded quietly. "I don't even like going to grandma and grandpa's house, because that's where we grew up."

"You don't act sad," Jack said back.

"I am," Lacey nodded, seeing Kelly. "You know what happened to me the other day?"

"What?" Jack asked.

"You know that big park by the lake?" Lacey asked him. "The one where your dad took you to learn to ride bikes?" He nodded. "Did you know he took me there when I was five to teach me?"

"Really?" Jack asked. It was hard to ever imagine his dad and aunt as kids, being only eight himself.

"Mhmm," she nodded. "Him and Uncle Kelly. And, you know what happened?" Jack shook his head; Kelly remembered this story. "They were ten and put me on a bike with no training wheels, on my first try." She started laughing. "I fell right over and smacked my chin off the concrete. They took turns carrying me to the hospital and I had to get seven stitches."

"That story sucks Aunt Lacey," Jack told her and she laughed a little as she got up to sit next to him on the bench, ruffling his hair.

"You have got to stop saying _sucks_ so much," she commented. "And, I know. But, I drove by that park the other day. And, you know what? It made me sad." She ruffled his hair again. "Can't keep avoiding all the stuff that makes us sad though. You know?" Jack nodded a little. His aunt was kind of making sense.

"I'll come in," Jack agreed. "But just for a minute."

"Fair enough," Lacey smiled at him, taking his hand as they got up to go inside.

"Hi Kelly," Jack greeted him, seeing him now.

"Hey big guy," Kelly high fived him, leading them inside. "Is it all right if you hang out with Matt and your brother, while I borrow your aunt?" Jack seemed unsure, barely convinced he should even set foot in this place. "It'll be two minutes, I'll bring her right back."

"Ok," Jack finally agreed, dropping his backpack by Sean's before going over to join his brother and the others.

"There's something I need to tell you," Lacey said as Kelly took her back the hall to Boden's office. He had already called Benny, who had been in town with the recent arson investigations.

"I already know," Kelly sighed as they went into the office and she looked at him curiously as he shut the door. "About Hadley."

"What?"

"Sean told me, he saw you in the parking lot," Kelly explained.

"He came to see me," Lacey told him now that he knew. "He said he was there to pick up Tina, but she moved districts." Kelly nodded. "He said that he saw you last night."

"Which wasn't the best idea on his part," Benny chimed in, but Kelly ignored his dad. The last thing Kelly should be giving their suspect was the attention he craved.

"What is going on?" Lacey finally asked.

"There's been a string of fires," Kelly started to explain. "First, it was an old house in our district. Then, it was my car. Then the Mills' diner, then more houses-"

"An arson?" Lacey asked with raised eye brows and he nodded. "And you think that it's Hadley?"

"There's a profile for this," Benny explained. "It pretty much describes Kevin Hadley."

"He's pissed off that he got kicked out of here," Kelly said.

"Well, he's especially pissed off at you," Lacey pointed out, recalling their conversation from earlier.

"I know," Kelly sighed, feeling responsible, even though there was nothing he could do or could have known to stop this. "I just needed you to know, so you can keep an eye out for anything strange."

"Like what?" Lacey asked, looking between the three men. Out of all the targets at fifty one, Hadley was taking his time to mess with Kelly for letting him go. That was apparent by the fact that he had cornered Lacey in the parking lot at school.

"Hadley hanging around," Benny started to say.

"If he comes near her again, I'm kicking his ass," Kelly interrupted his dad. "I'm not just going to ignore him and hope he slips up." Boden held up his hand to stop him.

"Just anything you find suspicious Lacey," Boden told her. "You report it to us, and we'll take care of this..." He looked to Kelly now. "How we're supposed to." Lacey nodded quietly while Kelly just shook his head; like he was actually going to just sit around during this.

"Walk me out?" Lacey said to Kelly and he nodded.

"I know this is a lot," Kelly said as he was walking her out. The boys were climbing out of the fire truck where they had been allowed to explore. "I didn't want to make you worry, I just..."

"Need me to keep an eye out," Lacey nodded as she motioned for the boys to follow her to the car. They waved a big goodbye to all of their dad's friends before grabbing their back packs and following Lacey out to the car, saying goodbye to Kelly before climbing in the back seat.

"You don't have to worry about anything," Kelly told her. "I'm going to take care of it, all right?" Lacey nodded as he kissed her once. "Are you going to head back to the apartment?"

"I was going to stay at my parents' tonight," she explained, having planned to take the boys there for the night while her parents were away on vacation. "Our kitchen stuff isn't unpacked, and I don't want to get the boys pizza." She laughed a little. "Again."

"Aw, but you'd be the coolest aunt ever," Kelly joked, kissing her again. "Just get a veggies lover pizza or something. Make it healthier."

"Uh huh," Lacey laughed, giving him one last quick kiss before climbing into her car. "I'll see you in the morning. Love you."

"Love you too," Kelly said, watching her drive away.

* * *

It was a fairly quiet night, with only a few calls coming in for the ambulance. Other than that, no one really moved that night, having a fairly easy shift. For now, they had just finished having dinner, everyone hanging out in the common room and watching the game. It was close to the end when the alarm went off, everyone listening closely to who was being called and where to.

Ambulance 61, Truck 81, Squad 3...house fire...

Kelly's heart dropped when he heard the address.

"That's the Darden's house," Kelly said as everyone was racing out to leave.

* * *

Kelly's heart was racing the entire ride to the Darden house. The entire way, he thought that they weren't driving fast enough or he cursed any car that was in their way too long. Shay and Dawson had gotten there first, the ambulance parked on the opposite side of the street of the house that had flames spouting from the windows. Getting out and running to the ambulance first, Kelly let out a breath when he saw that Shay was checking out Jack while Lacey stood there, holding Sean.

"Thank God," Kelly breathed. "Is everyone ok? Are you hurt or-"

"We're fine," Lacey stopped him, adjusting Sean as he hid his face in her collar bone. "You can-"

"I'm stayin' right here," Kelly shook his head, holding out his arms to take Sean from her. "You all right guys?" Sean nodded, his head resting against Kelly's shoulder now while Jack nodded through his check up. With everyone out, the only thing left was for truck to put the fire out. This was his family, Kelly wasn't going anywhere if he wasn't needed.

"What happened?" Kelly asked Lacey who was getting checked by Shay and Dawson last, sitting next to Jack on the back of the ambulance.

"We were baking, after dinner," Lacey tried to explain, shaking her head. "There was this weird smell." She sighed. "I thought it was my imagination, so I ignored it. We um...were watching a movie when the smoke alarms went off." She laughed, a bit cynically. "God, I thought it was the cookies...but the whole floor was filled with smoke..." She trailed off when she saw who was standing on their side of the street, watching the others put the fire out.

"Kelly," Lacey said and he looked over, seeing Hadley there, hands in his pockets as he watched.

"Take Sean," Kelly passed the five year old off to Dawson before he went marching over there.

"Kelly, don't!" Lacey called after him, trying to stop him but Shay held her arm, shaking her head. Luckily, a few others saw what Kelly was doing and went over to stop him before it got out of hand.

"Hey Kel-" Hadley was smirking at him, until Kelly grabbed him by the shirt and shoved him.

"You could have killed them!" Kelly shouted at him, taking a swing, his fist connecting with Hadley's jaw.

"Severide!" Boden and Casey were both calling as everyone tried to break up the fight. Kelly got another punch in, knocking Hadley to the ground before it took two of the other men to hold him back.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Hadley shook his head as he got to his feet, wiping the blood from his mouth.

"I know you started that!" Kelly said, lunging again but he was held back. "My _nephews_ were in there!" Hadley was shaking his head with a laugh. "They're kids Hadley, little kids!"

"I don't need this," Hadley shook his head, turning to walk off.

"I'll kill him," Kelly was saying, not sure if he was saying it just to himself or to Casey. "I'm going to kill him for that, he-"

"We're gonna get him," Casey nodded, assuring his friend. "Promise."

**thanks for reading! really hope that you liked it, sorry for the wait. please review! :)**


	14. Blowing Off Steam

**thanks so much for the reviews, follows, and favorites! :) it means so much to me! i love hearing your feedback! hope you like this update :) **

_Blowing of Steam_

Lacey sat at the counter that night, nearly pulling her hair out by the roots as she had a mess of papers sitting in front of her. Some of them were the papers from the insurance company for the claim on her parents' house that they needed her to fill out, since she was the one that was there. Lucky for the Dardens, their house was going to be able to be repaired, but it was going to take awhile.

The Dardens were back in town now, staying in a hotel while the repairs were done on the house. Knowing that things were overwhelming right now, with everything that was going on, Lacey's parents offered to take the boys for a few days to stay with them. The boys were excited, getting to stay in a hotel and swim in the pool. Lacey figured it would give her a chance to plan out their time, maybe get a grip on what was all going on but that didn't seem likely.

There were games, so many games at the same time between Jack playing hockey and Sean playing indoor soccer. And, of course, half the games were when Kelly was on shift. There were parent teacher conferences, not just for Jack and Sean but then Lacey had to be at the school to give them for her own students. Of course, being the same school, they were on the same night. There was the meeting with the insurance company, the police, arson investigation over the incident at her parents' house. When Kelly came in that night, Lacey was sitting there with her elbows on the counter, her head in her hands.

"Long day?" Kelly asked, pulling a bar stool over closer to her, sitting sideways to face her.

"Mmmm, little bit," Lacey sighed, rubbing her forehead before looking over at him.

"Can I help with anything?" Kelly asked genuinely.

"You already are," Lacey joked, sliding her planner over to him.

"Hockey Thursday, soccer Friday," he nodded, looking back at her. "Sounds good to me."

"Mmmm," she smiled, kissing him once, just happy that he was home. "How was the union meeting?"

"Ah," Kelly hesitated, scratching the back of his head. He didn't want to tell her about it, she worried enough in the week since the fire at her parents', not that it wasn't warranted.

"What?" Lacey asked curiously.

"Hadley was there," Kelly admitted.

"Seriously?" Lacey snapped.

"I'm handling it," Kelly assured her, though that didn't seem to make her feel any better.

"Kelly," Lacey went on. "Please don't." Kelly looked at her in confusion.

"What do you mean?" he asked, not knowing what was going on with her. "I'm going take care of what's going on, I'm going to protect you and the boys."

"And how are you going to do that if something happens to you?" Lacey asked, getting up from her seat. "If Hadley decides to set you on fire, or whatever the hell it is he wants to do."

"Hey," Kelly stopped her, grabbing her hand and pulling her over to his seat. "It's going to be all right baby, trust me." He squeezed her hand, pulling her closer to put his hands on her waist. "Don't..." He trailed off when he saw her expression. "_Try_ not to worry."

"I'm not promising anything," Lacey said lightly, looping her arms around his neck. He gave her a half smile, kissing her once.

"Wait," Kelly stopped kissing her, pulling back and standing up. "Do you hear that?"

"What?" Lacey asked in concern, looking around. Feeling Kelly picking her up, she squealed.

"The quiet," Kelly laughed, carrying her off to her room. They loved Jack and Sean, more than anything and were more than willing to take care of them while Heather was gone. But, tonight, they just enjoyed having a night to themselves.

* * *

"Hey Shay, Dawson," Kelly caught up with them as they were walking in to their shift the next morning. "Got a sec?"

"Yeah, sure," Dawson nodded as they were all walking inside.

"What's up?" Shay asked.

"Are you doing anything tomorrow night?" Kelly asked them and they both thought for a moment as they went into the locker room.

"Nope," Shay shook her head.

"Don't think so," Dawson agreed. "Why, what's up?"

"It's just," Kelly hesitated, not sure how to word it. "Lacey has been super on edge-"

"Someone set her parents' house on fire," Shay said like it was obvious. "With her and two kids in it."

"I know," Kelly agreed. "And, I get it, I'm freaking out about it too. But I'm going to fix it."

"How's that?" Shay asked, both her and Dawson looking at him intently.

"Not important," Kelly shook his head, having plans with Capp the next night to do something about catching Hadley in the act. "I just...I want Lacey to have fun. To relax and have a good time." He pointed at the two of them. "That's where you come in."

"Girls night?" Dawson smiled at Shay now.

"Yeah, I'm good with that," Shay grinned, loving Lacey and knowing having fun with girlfriends could be so much better than relaxing with your significant other. "We'll take good care of your girl."

"Thank you," Kelly said gratefully.

* * *

Dawson and Shay showed up at the apartment by surprise the next night, dragging Lacey out with them. She had protested at first, but eventually gave in, at the girls' and Kelly's insistence. Taking a cab to one of their favorite places, Shay and Dawson lead Lacey inside, not having been there before herself. They found an empty high top table with four stools.

"This place kind of reminds me of Molly's," Lacey commented.

"Yeah, except it's got people in it," Dawson grumbled, taking a seat.

"Ok, none of that," Shay said, hopping off her bar stool almost as soon as she sat on it. "I'm getting shots."

"Oh no," Lacey laughed in complaint as Shay went off to the bar to by them all shots. Feeling her phone buzzing in her pocket, she pulled it out to see who was calling her, seeing her mom's number.

"If it's Kelly, tell him to leave you alone," Dawson joked, making Lacey smile. "It's girls night."

"It might be one of my other men," Lacey joked, answering it. "Hello?" Sure enough, it was Sean. "Hi sweetie, how are you?"

"Who is it?" Shay asked Dawson, setting the shots out on the table and the plate with the lime wedges.

"One of the boys," Dawson told her.

"I miss you too," Lacey was saying. "I'll see you tomorrow for your game, all right?" She smiled. "All right, I love you too. Bye."

"Aw," Shay teased her, sliding a shot over to her; Lacey laughed.

"Hang up with Sean, take a shot," she joked. "So...responsible."

"Cheers to that," Shay laughed, the three girls clinking their shot glasses before throwing them back, then grabbing their limes.

"How are things going with them?" Dawson asked Lacey as the girls set their shot glasses down, someone coming over and getting their order for drinks.

"The boys are ok," Lacey nodded, twisting her hands on the table. "Adjusting I guess, but they're good."

"What about you and Kelly?" Shay asked now, sipping at her drink.

"I mean, Kelly's great with them," Lacey nodded. "He always has been. I, um..." She shook her head. "I guess we just weren't expecting to be parents?" It came out more like a question, then she bit her lip. "Or, we were but then..." She was stumbling on her words awkwardly as she just started spilling everything to Shay and Dawson. "Not to a six and eight year old." Shay and Dawson weren't sure what to say.

"I'm sorry," Lacey blurted out. "I didn't mean to dump all that on you guys."

"It's what we're here for," Shay assured her with a smile.

"Whatever you need," Dawson nodded.

"Thanks," Lacey said appreciatively, then smiled. "Right now, I think we need shots again."

"Yes!" Shay laughed, happy to have Lacey as her drinking partner again.

* * *

Kelly was sitting in Capp's car with him, parked half a block up from Hadley's building. They were waiting for him to show up so they could put a phone in his car, able to track him that way. They hoped to be able to catch him while he was setting one of the dangerous buildings on fire, putting an end to his arson streak. For now though, they were just stuck in a waiting game, hoping he would show up soon.

"Think one of his neighbors will call the cops?" Capp mused, knowing they looked suspicious just sitting there; Kelly laughed.

"Last thing we need right now," Kelly pointed out, keeping an eye on the mirror.

"Last thing you need," Capp commented, looking over at Kelly. "How are you holdin' up?"

"Fine," Kelly shrugged. "Dealing with this Hadley thing, before someone gets seriously hurt." He sighed, rubbing his eyes as true exhaustion started to set again. "Or almost hurt." Lacey and the boys had been ok, but it was close enough for Kelly; Capp nodded.

"What about Lacey?" Capp asked.

"I got her to go out with Shay and Dawson," Kelly explained. "I want her to have fun." He relaxed back in the seat, both their eyes on the mirror still. "Things have just been really tough."

"They'll get better," Capp assured him, then he noticed Hadley parking his car. "That him?"

"Mhmm," Kelly nodded, ready to set their plan into motion.

* * *

"I just, I don't know," Dawson was slurring.

On their round table were empty drink and shot glasses, the three women past drunk. Some where deep down they knew they were going to be painfully hung over tomorrow, but right now they didn't care. The more they were drinking, the more stuff kept coming up between the three of them. Right now, they were talking

"Don't know what?" Lacey said, sipping on what she thought was vodka-sprite but Shay had just gotten her a sprite for now.

"Maybe we should just sell the bar," Dawson said. "Between Game Day and freakin' Arthur..."

"Aw, come on," Shay protested.

"I think your bar is awesome," Lacey promised her.

"Mind spreading the word?" Dawson laughed, sipping on her own drink.

"You know what," Lacey giggled at the thought. "I'll tell all the parents' that come in for conferences next week." She, Shay, and Dawson started laughing.

"Can you imagine?" Shay laughed; Lacey turned a little on her stool to look at Shay.

"What about you?" Lacey asked her curiously, chewing on her straw.

"What about me?" Shay asked in confusion.

"I meeeeeean," Lacey was saying. "I'm playing house with my brother's kids and Dawson's bar is abandoned."

"Hey," Dawson protested.

"What's up with you?" Lacey asked Shay, ignoring Dawson for now.

"Ah...nothing," Shay laughed, not having much going on at the moment, getting over Clarice for the second time by now. "Except that I'm _starving_."

"Ugh, me too," Lacey agreed. "Are you Gabby?"

"I'm good," Dawson said, feeling a little sick. She got up, living only a few blocks from here. "You guys have fun though!"

"Thanks!" Shay said as the girls told Dawson goodbye.

"Oh my God, we have frozen pizza," Lacey said as if it was the greatest epiphany she had all night. "You should come over! Kelly will be so happy, it'll be like we all still live together."

"I _love_ that," Shay drunkenly agreed with her.

* * *

Kelly had returned home to an empty apartment, Capp dropping him off after they left Hadley's place. He had texted Lacey to make sure she was doing ok and she texted some jumbled up letters back, but he made it out to be that she was still with Shay and Dawson. Exhausted, Kelly went right to bed, dozing off before Lacey got back. It wasn't long though before he was woken up by some loud noise in the kitchen followed by a ton of laughter. Yawning and rubbing his eyes, Kelly pulled himself out of bed to see what was going on. He found Lacey and Shay sitting on the kitchen floor, laughing hysterically after they knocked a few things over. Kelly just leaned against the counter and watched them for a moment.

"Ahem," Kelly said and they looked over.

"Oh, shhhh," Lacey told Shay, who started laughing more.

"He's already up," she giggled, making Lacey laugh now.

"I take it you had fun?" Kelly asked with a smile.

"So much fun," Lacey told him, sitting cross legged on the floor. "Do you want pizza?"

"No," Kelly laughed. "I'm ok. I'm gonna go back to bed, all right?"

"Okayyyyyy," Lacey and Shay were both saying.

"Want me to pull out the couch?" Kelly asked Shay, the couch in the living room doubling as a pull out bed.

"Yes," Shay nodded.

"Cause we can't," Lacey added with a head shake, looking at Shay. "Our couch is stupid."

"I hate stupid couches," Shay agreed, both of them laughing again. Kelly shook his head to himself, glad they had fun but he had a feeling he was going to be catering to two very hung over women in the morning.

"All right," Kelly said, done with the couch. "Good night."

"Good night," the girls told him, blowing him exaggerated kisses before going back to trying to make pizza. He wasn't able to go back to sleep, their laughing and knocking into things keeping him up. Soon though, he heard Lacey telling Shay good night before heading back to their room, leaving the light off as she shut the door. Some how finding her way through the dark, Lacey crawled under the blankets before moving to sit on top of Kelly.

"Hi," she giggled, leaning over to kiss him once.

"Mmm, hi," Kelly said sleepily.

"Are you mad you're up?" Lacey asked quietly.

"No," Kelly promised, taking her hand and kissing it. "I'm just glad you had fun tonight."

"Me too," Lacey giggled, squeezing his hand. "We should have fun more."

"We can," Kelly promised her. Things had been getting crazy lately, but it would settle down soon and they'd be able to settle back into a routine. "Once things slow down a little."

"Ok," Lacey smiled, falling over to the side so she was laying next to him now, making him laugh. "Did you and Capp catch Hadley?" Kelly turned his head over to look at her, not sure how she knew that as he was trying to be discrete about what was going on with the Hadley investigation. "Shay told me."

"We're going to track him," Kelly explained. "See if we can catch him in the act." She nodded quietly.

"Promise you'll be careful," Lacey told him, sticking her hand out and holding up her pinky. When she was little, she would make him and Andy pinky promise her all the time.

"Promise," Kelly assured her, wrapping his little finger around hers.

"Cause I can't do this by myself," Lacey continued. "The boys need you."

"Well, I love them," Kelly promised, kissing her forehead as she started closing her eyes. "And you. So, I'm not going anywhere. Ok?" Lacey didn't answer as she was already asleep. "Ok," he agreed with himself, kissing her head one more time before pulling her close as he finally fell asleep for the night.

**thanks for reading! :) really hope you liked the update, more soon! :)**


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